Food Absolutely nastiest cocktails/mixers you've ever made/consumed...

So, as I am trying to cut down on my drinking a bit, I've been holding off on drinking anything until at least 10pm. I know, not the wisest choice for dietary reasons, but it's working so far--I haven't drank nearly as much as usual. If I started drinking when I got home, I'd be at least 4-5 beers/2-4 half-and-half mixers deep by the time late night came on...I get home at 8pm.

Regardless of my drinking habits, I'm currently drinking a 2 part vodka, 2 part OJ, and 2 part lemonaide (the crystal light nasty shit)...it's not horrible, but not great either. I'm just bored, not craving anything, figured I'd try a new concoction.

So....what's been the worst?

 

Worst I've ever had was a broke night in college. We were pre-gaming before we went out to the dance hall, and all we had is half a bottle of Southern Comfort and a half bottle of Juarez Tequila (plastic bottle).

We decided "fuck it", and made a drink calling it "Mexican Comfort".

Yeah.. it was nasty but it did the trick.

 

College: jug mix-up of generic vodka, Boone's Farm strawberry wine, supermarket brand blackberry schnapps, supermarket brand lemon-lime soda. Closest I've ever come to hurling from booze (usually I have a cast iron gut for alcohol). That shit was nasty as a three-dollar hooker. Probably tasted like one, too.

Bad shit, but marginally less nasty-tasting, we used to mix a drink called a "Violent Fuck," which was a jumbo red cup (you know the kind I mean) containing a double shot of everclear, filled to the brim with Jolt Cola. Horrible, horrible beverage. Only thing I have ever drunk that made me rowdy and aggressive. I think it was the drink that made me quit getting drunk (switched to getting stoned, instead, and never looked back). From then on, I limited my drinking to alcohol worth drinking for the taste.

 

I remember someone ordering me something called a "Cement Mixer", it was a shot of something followed by a shot of Bailey's, and you had to hold both in your mouth and shake your head violently before swallowing. Basically the first shot made the shot of Bailey's curdle, and if you didn't swallow it quickly, it expanded and solidified so that you had no choice but to spit it out. Total waste of money, but it was someone else's coin, so I didn't care.

 

Interesting. Sounds kind of gross, from a texture perspective, but interesting none the less.

 

At college, I created a drink known by the first thing said about it.

Over ice, in a heavy based whiskey glass, layer equal parts Pernod, Cointreau, and Blue Curacao.

It was called "Fuck me! What's that?".

Notable mainly for making your vomit blue, and orange flavoured.

 

I had a friend who would play a game called Drink This. And that was what he called the drink, too. Never the same twice, it was, at it's essence, camel piss. That is to say--for the benefit of those unfamiliar with the term--he would take scraps of whatever liquors and mixers were around at a given party and dump them in a glass. He would pop up in front of someone like a damn booze ninja, shove this....thing in a random person's face, and declare "drink this!" Participants were often willing, but never played a second time. I believe the most memorable was a shot of 1/2 Hot Damn cinnamon schnapps and 1/2 Avalanche peppermint schnapps.

 

Don't know how many Simpsons fans we have here, but my friend Nate and I decided to try and recreated Flaming Homers one night. There was grape cough syrup, and splashes of vodka, everclear, gin, rum, and whiskey, and we floated some 100 proof Hot Damn on top so we could ignite it. It was...interesting...

 

We used Mad Dog 20/20 with any vodka we could get our grubby underage hands on in the 70's.