Love or Obsession????
 

how do you tell the difference?

short story: a couple months back, the girl i was with for about a year dumped me. i loved her very much and she knew that. today, i still feel the love for her. we work in the same building so i see her everyday and still have the random, quick chat. i was talking to a friend of hers a couple nights ago and was telling her that i still love her and i can't get over her. she asked if i loved her or was just obsessing over her? i told her it was love, but that got me thinking: how would i know? i believe that an obsession would be to constantly call or drive by her house or stalk her. i don't do those things. there's just a feeling that i have that i can't get rid of. i didn't post this to get help on how to get over people, because there are a ton of those threads, i'm just curious as to how to tell the difference between love and obsession? thanks :thumbsup:

Most simple of ways: love is accepting things as they are and moving on, holding nothing but affection and good wishes for her. Obssession: going over and over what was, what could have been, what might be if things were just a little different. Hope that helps.

You're not crazy, and you shouldn't have to tell the difference, her friend is just a bitch. You don't ask someone post-breakup if you really loved them or if you're just obsessing, that's a bitch thing to do. Now, you've got this question looming over your head for no reason.

You got dumped, you loved her before you got dumped, therefore you love her. If you continue to do so for a long period of time, reject other girls because they're "not her" (after a period of normal grieving), or otherwise alter your life because you can't have her and want her, then you're becoming obsessive.

Until then, don't worry about it, her bitch friend just put a bad idea in your head, you're fine.

thanks for the definition ngdawg, that does make sense.

and to you analog, i didn't view it like that. i guess if i hold on too long, then it becomes an obsession. thanks.

I think ngdawg is right. I don't think a person can ever stop loving someone, especially when they've been with them for that long... I've been there.