Nice Guys
 

I hear everyone complaining that theyre the nice guy and girls never go for them. And i was like that untill recently. Ive taken the personality tests latley and compared them to before, and its flip flopped. I actually went from introvert to extrovert. So things are way different lately.

Anyways Im pretty sure the key to being a nice guy is establish that you are interested right away. If this is a big problem immediatley start out online. My "e-seducing" skils are impecable at the moment. I mean i hate to be smug but from my experiance this is the best way to do it. Once you figure out that you are interested start flirting. I think the biggest problem with nice guys, is that its hammered in thier heads that girls go for "assholes." This isnt true at all. The nice guys get this idea and lose some confidence. Girls go for the best canidates of the outgoing, confident guys.

Another thing is worrying too much before you do something. Seriously, if you do something, and she doesnt like it, why bother?
Whats the worst thats gonna happen? You establish that she isnt interested instead of just sitting there wondering and worrying?

Thats about all i have on this at the moment. Im just kinda getting tired of all the nice guys finish last type things. But seeing as i was like that up till awhile ago, i cant blame you.

I don't finish last, but I'm a nice guy. Stereotypes are typically a lot less true than most people think.

all it takes is 6-7 pints in me and i go from an introvert to an extrovert and get a lot of confidence. I got some random girls number on the street last night :D

Exactly. I mean a lot are true, and i find them funny. But this is one that just gets hammered into most nice guys heads.

EDIT: And yea, alcohol does wonders to the confidence eh?

I'd recommend it to any guy whos scared of talking to random chicks at a pub/bar. You dont give a stuff if you get rejected or not, as long as you dont get arrested for doing something stupid :D

not true, when i get fucked up, especially stoned, i have about as much game as a sega genisis with the controller cord chewed off.

You don't need to alter your state of consciousness to get girls to like you. It isn't really about being introverted or extroverted, as many girls like that "mysterious" type. All it takes is the will to action. I think what holds most "nice guys" back is the fear of commiting to any action. If you aren't going to go out on a limb and let someone know that you like them, what else aren't you going to do for them? What about for yourself?

Another thing, the "nice guy" thing is a little worn out. I think too many "nice guys" act like martyrs - a victim to everything. "Girls don't like me because I'm too nice" just doesn't make any sense. There is something else going wrong there, and complaining along those lines indicates a problem. You can't control others, but you can certainly change that attitude.

Who wants to be with someone that is victimized by everything? It doesn't appear too nice to me.

You make a good point. Though i am guilty of acting like that, no one likes negativity. You have to try to remove your inhibitions (without alchohol if possible :D) and act in a genial, charismatic way. This is the best way to attract girls.

Most people who call themselves "nice guys" let girls walk all over them. This is *not* attractive, as it shows that you are insecure and unwilling to put your foot down...

I guess the point of this short rant is to be confident and stay positive :)

I stopped getting stoned, and have noticed that I'm much more talkative. When I see a girl eyeing me across the way, I watch for that second eye contact, and go strike a conversation. When I used to smoke, I'd recognize the eye contact, and continue to make it, but eventually the lady's interest would die after a while, and she'd move on, and I'd wonder why no girl's ever talked to me! Getting rid of that one inhibitor helped A LOT for me (might not work so well for others?).

Well getting stoned generally makes you laid back and not too outgoing. When i got high pretty much the only thing i was outgoing for was cookie dough.

Thats very true. I'm the same way. I have fairly low confidence when it comes to meeting new people, especially girls. I've had a few good girlfriends, but girls certainly aren't flocking to me. 2 of my girlfriends started out online. We still definitly hung out and talked in person a bunch, but we did a lot of talking online right off the bat which I think helped a lot.

I can be myself a lot more online than I do in person, unless it's somebody I know pretty well. Which is good because after I warm up to the girl online, I'm able to be more relaxed and confident around them when we hang out.

nice guys are fine. the problem is that people who believe themselves to be "nice guys" are usually 1) pussies 2) weirdos... ;)

True dat rune :)
I have/used to have this "syndrom"
The problem is, is that when it's your time to set up and make a move, you dont.
You need to be a jerk and kiss her or whatever.

Kissing her doesn't make you a jerk.

excelent point my friend, see the holw thing behind 'jerks' is that they show that theyre in control and confident through being a 'jerk' while the 'nice guys' project 'im a wuss and you own me', ofcourse you cant be abusive and everything but in my opinion you cant shower a girl with compliments and just be an ass kisser and expect her to like you anything more than a friend...just my opinion.

No, I know that. I didnt really word my post quite well. What I meant is... You know when you meet a girl and your not quite sure if the time is right yet, nice guys normally will wait to make sure 100% it is okay to kiss her.
At least I would before.
Back when I was MORE of a nice guy that I am now, I was camping and when I finally got alone w/ the girl I was after we were chilling and talking for a few minutes until she goes and says. You know your really being a pussy in this situation. I of course turned and immediately started kissing her.
Now to counter that old pussy story of mine. I was at the bar last week, and just started dancing w/ this girl and we were making out before our first song even got over.
So from the first story to the next, you can see that a risk is all there is between a nice guy and a 'jerk'. I still consider myself a nice guy, but now a see a little more action then in the past.

you seem to discount the fact that a woman may want to kiss / fuck as well. sex is good, men AND gosh EVEN women enjoy it! god knows why so many guys in here seem to think a mutual decison between a women and a man to have sex makes you a "jerk".

That's the key, "nice guys" don't get girls interested because most of the time they ARE pussies and pussies don't hit the attraction button in a girl's subconscious.

Imho, there's just a bunch of fucked up girls out there who instead of having normal relationships with regular guys insist on being treated like crap by jerks.
Maybe it has something to do with the way they were treated as a kid or something.

But of course, there's a lot of healthy, normal girls out there who will reciprocate your kindness instead of get turned off by it.

I agree to a point rainheart. If youre wait long enough youre gonna find a girl with that thought of thinking. Apparently thats what you want so theres absolutely nothing wrong with it.

It all just depends what you want and are willing for.

Yeah, but if you never bother to go talk to any girls, and show them your kindness, they rarely make the initial approach to you.

It's amazing how just getting past the initial fear of rejection, and talking to a girl helps

I married a nice guy, and one of my favorite discoveries about him was that, deep in the creamy center of his nice guy-ness, there was a deliciously sinful boy, begging to play.

I'm the exception to all the rules. I'm not a nice guy and I never win.

Thank god I married one of the healthy ones......

I guess I'm what you might call a "nice boy" in that I believe I know how to treat the opposite sex, rather than how I EXPECT them to treat me. Tell you what I'll do. You get your average "bad boy", give us say 90 days, send us to bars, night clubs, bowling alleys, hell Krogers, I don't care. We will both report back at the end of the time period, and we will see who gets laid the most times. He might win, and if so thats ok, I will have won in the long run because I have also built something with most of those women.

I'm a very nice guy, I try to be respectful in all of my endeavours, but I do well with the ladies.

My friend H12, on the other hand, is the epitome of the last-place nice guy. I'm gonna draw him in here eventually so he can speak on it, cause I'm sure he'll love to.