Is this strange? - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

googleplex · 11-20-2003, 12:46 PM

Ok, here's the deal.

I broke up with this girl a while ago and we had been dating for 2 months (I know, pathetic). Anyway, she has gotten together with this guy who is a real douche-bag and it just makes me pretty angry.

Is it strange to not particularily want to have the girl back, but to hate it when she's with another guy?

erion · 11-20-2003, 12:48 PM

Not strange, but not something you should get hung up on, either.

I the realtionship only lasted two months you could and should be out finding someone else to take your attention off the girl who you feel could have done better with you.

But then, you broke up with her, didn't you?

wilbjammin · 11-20-2003, 12:51 PM

Many have written that the idea of her being with an Other is much worse than simply not having her.

Is it worse for her to be with someone not as good as you, or to be with someone much better than you were? ... Or someone who was just like you?

vveronica · 11-20-2003, 12:52 PM

not to worry about it. It is the left over feelings you still have...
It is not uncommon. even though you broke up with her you still want her to want you.... It will pass as fast as you let it..

googleplex · 11-20-2003, 12:53 PM

You're completely right. It's not something to get hung up over. I try not to let it get to me.

I guess it's better that she's with a guy who's not as good as me. I don't want to sound arrogant, but this guy isn't as good as me, in my opinion and in the opinion of others.

rogue49 · 11-20-2003, 01:25 PM

This more of a subtle feeling of "why not me?"
not "he's not as good as me"

Even though you've stated that you don't want her back,
the breakup doesn't sound like it was totally your choice.
So, you're saying to yourself...well it's not really worth it to start back up,
but at the same time you're saying why did the breakup happen in the first place?
Why did she have issues with ME? (whether valid or not)

This is not uncommon nor unusual
Time to say..."fuck it" and move on.
Hey, sometimes it's not you...it just "is"...no logic to it.

skysooner · 11-20-2003, 02:19 PM

Yes, it is normal. It just takes time to go away. The longer you are with someone, the longer the feeling persists after the breakup. Find someone else, and it goes away much quicker

taliendo · 11-20-2003, 03:27 PM

I just recently went through the same exact thing. My gf of over a year and I broke up. We had a lot of problems and the relationship just wasn't moving in the right direction. . .BUT in less than a week she hooked up with some loser (with the same vices that she hated in me multiplied by like a bazillion.)

I was bitter, but as rogue said, "'fuck it.' and move on."

analog · 11-20-2003, 09:44 PM

REEEEEEEEEBOUUUUUUND *BOING*

But seriously, she's just going after something because she's broken up with you... OR you were such a shitty boyfriend (no offense to you, i'm saying from HER point of view) that she'd kinda been looking for a while.

2 months is nothing to sweat, you didn't even really date, man... you just hung out for a while and nothing came of it. 2 months barely counts in the long run.

Go find another girl, and seriously try to just ignore her now. Doesn't sound like you're incredible friends with her, so just go out and replace her. If you're a truly good guy, she won't be missed.

googleplex · 11-20-2003, 09:55 PM

True. Thanks a lot for the insight guys. I appreciate it.

tritium · 11-20-2003, 09:57 PM

1) Misery loves company. (let her move on.)

2) People always desire what they cannot have. (she's gone, so you should be too... nothing to see here, move along, sir.)

Wise1010 · 11-20-2003, 10:17 PM

All I can tell you man is just forget about her and move on. Like everyone said...2 months isn't too long. The best way to get over your feelings is to go out and find another girl to hang out with if at best. And even that's the best way to make her jealous and maybe miss you some, which by the sounds of things is what you want. Right now she looks at it like yea she found someone and you couldn't and she's now superior or better than you. Just go out with a friend or something to start with, but get out and don't worry about it!!

11-20-2003, 12:46 PM	#1 (permalink)
googleplex Tilted	Is this strange? Ok, here's the deal. I broke up with this girl a while ago and we had been dating for 2 months (I know, pathetic). Anyway, she has gotten together with this guy who is a real douche-bag and it just makes me pretty angry. Is it strange to not particularily want to have the girl back, but to hate it when she's with another guy?

11-20-2003, 12:51 PM	#3 (permalink)
wilbjammin * * *	Many have written that the idea of her being with an Other is much worse than simply not having her. Is it worse for her to be with someone not as good as you, or to be with someone much better than you were? ... Or someone who was just like you? __________________ Innominate.

11-20-2003, 12:52 PM	#4 (permalink)
vveronica Psycho Location: northern california	not to worry about it. It is the left over feelings you still have... It is not uncommon. even though you broke up with her you still want her to want you.... It will pass as fast as you let it.. __________________ ...We find ourselves in a struggle for our very right to exsist... We will not go quietly into the night... We will not give up without a fight...

11-20-2003, 03:27 PM	#8 (permalink)
taliendo Insane Location: an indelible crawl through the gutters	I just recently went through the same exact thing. My gf of over a year and I broke up. We had a lot of problems and the relationship just wasn't moving in the right direction. . .BUT in less than a week she hooked up with some loser (with the same vices that she hated in me multiplied by like a bazillion.) I was bitter, but as rogue said, "'fuck it.' and move on." __________________ -LIFE IS ABSURD-

11-20-2003, 09:57 PM	#11 (permalink)
tritium Professor of Drinkology	1) Misery loves company. (let her move on.) 2) People always desire what they cannot have. (she's gone, so you should be too... nothing to see here, move along, sir.) __________________ Blah.

11-20-2003, 12:48 PM	#2 (permalink)
erion Psycho	Not strange, but not something you should get hung up on, either. I the realtionship only lasted two months you could and should be out finding someone else to take your attention off the girl who you feel could have done better with you. But then, you broke up with her, didn't you?

11-20-2003, 12:53 PM	#5 (permalink)
googleplex Tilted	You're completely right. It's not something to get hung up over. I try not to let it get to me. I guess it's better that she's with a guy who's not as good as me. I don't want to sound arrogant, but this guy isn't as good as me, in my opinion and in the opinion of others.

11-20-2003, 01:25 PM	#6 (permalink)
rogue49 Loser	This more of a subtle feeling of "why not me?" not "he's not as good as me" Even though you've stated that you don't want her back, the breakup doesn't sound like it was totally your choice. So, you're saying to yourself...well it's not really worth it to start back up, but at the same time you're saying why did the breakup happen in the first place? Why did she have issues with ME? (whether valid or not) This is not uncommon nor unusual Time to say..."fuck it" and move on. Hey, sometimes it's not you...it just "is"...no logic to it.

11-20-2003, 02:19 PM	#7 (permalink)
skysooner Registered User Location: Oklahoma	Yes, it is normal. It just takes time to go away. The longer you are with someone, the longer the feeling persists after the breakup. Find someone else, and it goes away much quicker

11-20-2003, 09:44 PM	#9 (permalink)
analog Banned	REEEEEEEEEBOUUUUUUND BOING But seriously, she's just going after something because she's broken up with you... OR you were such a shitty boyfriend (no offense to you, i'm saying from HER point of view) that she'd kinda been looking for a while. 2 months is nothing to sweat, you didn't even really date, man... you just hung out for a while and nothing came of it. 2 months barely counts in the long run. Go find another girl, and seriously try to just ignore her now. Doesn't sound like you're incredible friends with her, so just go out and replace her. If you're a truly good guy, she won't be missed.

11-20-2003, 09:55 PM	#10 (permalink)
googleplex Tilted	True. Thanks a lot for the insight guys. I appreciate it.

11-20-2003, 10:17 PM	#12 (permalink)
Wise1010 Upright Location: West Virginia	All I can tell you man is just forget about her and move on. Like everyone said...2 months isn't too long. The best way to get over your feelings is to go out and find another girl to hang out with if at best. And even that's the best way to make her jealous and maybe miss you some, which by the sounds of things is what you want. Right now she looks at it like yea she found someone and you couldn't and she's now superior or better than you. Just go out with a friend or something to start with, but get out and don't worry about it!! __________________ "Faith is believing in something when common sense tells you not to!"