A question for all. Any Help would be good. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Xiphias · 07-11-2003, 06:28 PM

Ok...

I was considering posting this in the Ladie's Lounge. but I'll just do it here.

Well... my girlfriend of eight months and I have been sexually active for about five months. She's been on the pill for the majority of that time and that was the only contraceptive we used, but about a month ago she stopped taking the tablets because of its many side-effects, so we started using condoms. Anywho... the pill is known to give "fake" periods, and when a girl stops taking them it gives one fake period and then the second period after stopping is not definate.

She should have got her period a week ago. So, my dilemma is if she is pregnant or not. I am very afraid that she might be, I'm 18 as is she, and we're both finising school this year. A child is something I very much dont want right now.

So, what should I do? How long should I wait? And what action should I take?

Thanks for the help guys and gals...

Holo · 07-11-2003, 06:58 PM

Get a home pregnancy test, 2 of them. Have her take both and if it says no they are pretty accurate, but *not* infallible. If it says no then wait till she gets her period. If it doesn't show for a month then get a real test from a doctor or Familly Planning. If abortion is a possibility it's cheapest in the first trimester (less than $400) so don't sit on it too long to make a decision. If you are opposed to that then good luck to you.

Kadath · 07-11-2003, 07:10 PM

Just about any couple that is sexually active has had a pregnancy scare. My advice would be to follow Holo's, and aside from that, don't panic. Worst 4 days of my life were over that shit, and it was fine after all.

Xiphias · 07-11-2003, 07:31 PM

I've heard mixed reports of the accuracy of home pregnancy tests... some say they are horrible inaccurate. I'll get some, that's not a hassle. I'm hoping its just a late period because of stress or change in life-style or something...

An abortion would be the way to go. I'm not sure of the availability of the abortion tablets in Australia, but that would be the way to go. I'd rather steer clear from surgery. If it comes to that... I really really hope not.

Thanks for the advice... Any more would also be greatly appreciated.

spectre · 07-11-2003, 08:03 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Xiphias
I was considering posting this in the Ladie's Lounge. but I'll just do it here.

Good thing that you didn't. The Ladie's Lounge is only for the Ladies to post in. They tend to get agitated when a guy posts in there. I'd tell you what happened to the last guy that posted in there, but they haven't found his body yet.

Xiphias · 07-11-2003, 08:16 PM

Yeh, dont worry. I would have seeked a mod's permission first, and if it was not granted it would not have happened.

I understand...

erion · 07-11-2003, 08:27 PM

I have not yet experienced a home pregnancy test that was wrong. I've been present at the use of five of them, and only two of them gave a positive result. These were the two that were used when we were trying to have a baby. They were right.

When we called the doctor to set up an appointment, they didn't even want to confirm the home pregnancy tests. They told my wife that they are easily as accurate as the one the hospital would use as long as they are used properly.

Follow the directions and that's 'nuff said, I would think.

GoldenOuroboros · 07-12-2003, 02:08 AM

Home pregnancy tests.. ahh yes.. In australia there's a brand that is exactly the same that the docs use.. comes in a little blue box, 9 bucks for a set of two I think.

But don't worry about it mate. Had many a scare in my time with my girl. Wasn't anything to worry about. Be worried if you KNOW that the condom broke when you were having sex. And if your girl starts to worry about it. This is what got me and my girl is STRESS! This can have bad affects on the ol' period. Can make it 'dissappear' for a month or two...

But if it's not in by the next time it's due.. goe and buy yourself a test kit

That will tell you if she is or she isn't.

cheerios · 07-12-2003, 03:11 AM

yeah, pregnancy test can't hurt. If you're REALLY nervous, she can get tested at her gyno, also.

CmC918 · 07-12-2003, 03:33 AM

Test, like previos posters said. It doesn't hurt at all.

lurkette · 07-12-2003, 04:53 AM

I went off the pill briefly about 10 years ago and we used condoms, and I had the same "late period" scare - about the same age, too. I eventually got my period, not before I'd sweated bullets, though. Get the pregnancy tests and good luck to you.

tikki · 07-12-2003, 05:42 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kadath
Just about any couple that is sexually active has had a pregnancy scare.

yeah, every fucking month. It's the compulsive worrying I am cursed with.

ratbastid · 07-12-2003, 05:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kadath
Just about any couple that is sexually active has had a pregnancy scare. My advice would be to follow Holo's, and aside from that, don't panic. Worst 4 days of my life were over that shit, and it was fine after all.

I hear that!

Red became my favorite color after that....

SiN · 07-12-2003, 05:52 AM

test!

the sooner she finds out, the sooner and better she/you can take any necessary action, etc...

Cynthetiq · 07-12-2003, 05:59 AM

plenty of good responses here...

Xiphias · 07-12-2003, 04:34 PM

Thanks a lot guys....

The help has been awesome, what an excellent community.

I'll grab a few tests, get her to take them. She hates doctors, so this is the best chance for now.

I hope more than anything that it is just a scare, and nothing more, i dont know what I'll do if she's pregnant.

Does anyone know, per chance, if those abortion tablets are available in Australia on prescription?

Donkeypuncher · 07-12-2003, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kadath
Just about any couple that is sexually active has had a pregnancy scare.

word.

Happened first when I was 18 and as recently as 2 months ago. Never panned out - it's always been stress. But! The very first step is to get her tested asap. There's really no point in getting all worked up until you know there's actually something happening and even then, the steps are pretty clear, ya know? You make the decision, you act on it... whatever the right decision is for the two of you.

But for now, try not to freak out. She's probably more freaked than you could ever be - there's is a possibility that there is a child inside her and she can't escape that if it's true. Don't forget, in dealing with her through this, that that's the place she'll be coming from. She's going to experience it differently than you will, guaranteed. Be gentle with her, more understanding than usual, helpful and... steady. If you're freaked out, talk to people here about it, talk to your friends, talk to your family, but try not to let her see much of it. Concern is good, freaked isn't. And take it one step at a time. Get the tests for her... be involved. It'll all work out.

good luck, bro

Slims · 07-12-2003, 07:48 PM

If she doesn't get big, then she isn't pregnant.

Seriously, the pill can really mess with a girls cycle. I have had girlfriends miss periods when they are on it, and have wierd things happen when they go off.

I wouldn't worry about it unless she starts to show other signs of pregnancy, or she doesn't get her period withing the next month.

And be sure to remind her that since she might already be pregnant, she has a lower than normal risk of getting pregnant from sex.

123dsa · 07-12-2003, 08:09 PM

Get the tests dude, the sooner you find out the sooner you can decide what to do. Whatever the decision good luck to you.

Xiphias · 07-12-2003, 08:35 PM

Ok... due to the advice of almost everyone, I'm going to get the tests today. I work at a chemist, so I'll pick it up while working.\

DonkeyPuncher - thank you so much for your concern. You have hit the nail on the head in terms of behaviour. Yeh, I need to really support her. Thanks so much for the advice. I really appreciate it.

Greg700 - I'd rather not wait till she does get big to find out. And yeh, I will remind her of that fact

heh heh heh...

crow_daw · 07-13-2003, 12:08 AM

I've had a pregnancy scare before too, but the girl was a total drama queen, so it turned out to be nothing, but I know what its like to be scared out of your mind too. Just stay as calm as possible and get that shit tested.

07-13-2003, 07:09 PM

I think pretty much any person who's sexually active has had a pregnancy scare. It's just a fact of life. Being so soon after stopping the pill I wouldn't worry, but taking a pregnancy test sure wouldn't hurt.

Janie · 07-13-2003, 08:11 PM

First off, the pill is notorious for its effects on a woman's cycle. It works on a cycle of 28 days, which is about average, but many women have shorter or longer natural cycles. Once a woman is off the hormones, it takes time for the body to adjust and return to its natural cycle.
Secondly, at 18, many women still have frequent irregularities in their cycle.
Thirdly, a change in hormones can and does affect the emotional state of an individual. Coming off the pills would have most likely effected a change in your GF's emotions. It may have made her feel under stress, and that can delay a period.
Fourthly, as some other people mentioned, it could be other stress she's experiencing, like finishing school.

My bet is on Possibility Number One. If her period is delayed more than about two weeks, get a pregnancy test done. Good luck!

Xiphias · 07-13-2003, 08:22 PM

Thanks Janie.

I have two tests, bought em yesterday.

I'll give them to her when I see her today.

Maybe do one today and one next week

motdakasha · 07-13-2003, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Greg700
If she doesn't get big, then she isn't pregnant.

That's probably the last sign you want to rely on for symptoms of pregnancy especially if you will want to abort. There are signs that comes much earlier that are just as obvious as a big belly... like morning sickness for instance. Kinda hard to overlook that symptom.

<hr>
Googled "symptoms pregnancy"
Found: http://www.pregnancy-info.net/pregnancysymptoms.html

Symptoms & Signs | Time | Other Reasons for the symptoms

Delay in Menstration | During entire pregnancy | Excessive weight gain or loss, hormonal problems, ceasing to take Birth control

Tender/Swollen Breasts | 1-2 weeks after conception | Hormonal imbalance, Birth control, impending menstration

Fatigue | 1-6 Weeks after conception | Exhaustion, depression, common cold or flu

Nausea/Vomiting | 2-8 weeks after conception | Food poisoning, stomach disorders

Frequent Urination | 6-8 Weeks after conception | Urinary infection, diabetes, taking excessive diuretics

Backaches | During entire pregnancy | Impending menstration, physical or mental strains, other back problems

Frequent Headaches | Sometimes entire pregnancy | Dehydration, caffeine withdrawal, eye strain, other ailments

Food Cravings | During entire pregnancy | Poor diet, depression, stress, impending menstration

<hr>

6-8 weeks for signs of "growing" is like 2/3 into the first trimester... and optimal abortions happen early in the first trimester. Doesn't really give you much time, does it?

nulltype · 07-13-2003, 09:30 PM

I suspect that Greg's post was made partially in jest.

sub zero · 07-13-2003, 10:21 PM

<b>Save yourself the stress</b> and get her checked out by a doctor.

07-11-2003, 06:28 PM	#1 (permalink)
Xiphias Crazy	A question for all. Any Help would be good. Ok... I was considering posting this in the Ladie's Lounge. but I'll just do it here. Well... my girlfriend of eight months and I have been sexually active for about five months. She's been on the pill for the majority of that time and that was the only contraceptive we used, but about a month ago she stopped taking the tablets because of its many side-effects, so we started using condoms. Anywho... the pill is known to give "fake" periods, and when a girl stops taking them it gives one fake period and then the second period after stopping is not definate. She should have got her period a week ago. So, my dilemma is if she is pregnant or not. I am very afraid that she might be, I'm 18 as is she, and we're both finising school this year. A child is something I very much dont want right now. So, what should I do? How long should I wait? And what action should I take? Thanks for the help guys and gals...

07-11-2003, 06:58 PM	#2 (permalink)
Holo A Real American	Get a home pregnancy test, 2 of them. Have her take both and if it says no they are pretty accurate, but not infallible. If it says no then wait till she gets her period. If it doesn't show for a month then get a real test from a doctor or Familly Planning. If abortion is a possibility it's cheapest in the first trimester (less than $400) so don't sit on it too long to make a decision. If you are opposed to that then good luck to you. __________________ I happen to like the words "fuck", "cock", "pussy", "tits", "cunt", "twat", "shit" and even "bitch". As long as I am not using them to describe you, don't go telling me whether or not I can/should use them...that is, if you want me to continue refraining from using them to describe you. ~Prince

07-11-2003, 07:10 PM	#3 (permalink)
Kadath Muffled Location: Camazotz	Just about any couple that is sexually active has had a pregnancy scare. My advice would be to follow Holo's, and aside from that, don't panic. Worst 4 days of my life were over that shit, and it was fine after all. __________________ it's quiet in here

07-12-2003, 02:08 AM	#8 (permalink)
GoldenOuroboros The Cheshire Grin... Location: An Aussie Outback	Home pregnancy tests.. ahh yes.. In australia there's a brand that is exactly the same that the docs use.. comes in a little blue box, 9 bucks for a set of two I think. But don't worry about it mate. Had many a scare in my time with my girl. Wasn't anything to worry about. Be worried if you KNOW that the condom broke when you were having sex. And if your girl starts to worry about it. This is what got me and my girl is STRESS! This can have bad affects on the ol' period. Can make it 'dissappear' for a month or two... But if it's not in by the next time it's due.. goe and buy yourself a test kit That will tell you if she is or she isn't. __________________ Can you see me grin grin grrriiiiinnnning?!

07-12-2003, 03:33 AM	#10 (permalink)
CmC918 Upright Location: UpState NY	Test, like previos posters said. It doesn't hurt at all. __________________ Kthx

07-11-2003, 07:31 PM	#4 (permalink)
Xiphias Crazy	I've heard mixed reports of the accuracy of home pregnancy tests... some say they are horrible inaccurate. I'll get some, that's not a hassle. I'm hoping its just a late period because of stress or change in life-style or something... An abortion would be the way to go. I'm not sure of the availability of the abortion tablets in Australia, but that would be the way to go. I'd rather steer clear from surgery. If it comes to that... I really really hope not. Thanks for the advice... Any more would also be greatly appreciated.

07-11-2003, 08:16 PM	#6 (permalink)
Xiphias Crazy	Yeh, dont worry. I would have seeked a mod's permission first, and if it was not granted it would not have happened. I understand...

07-11-2003, 08:27 PM	#7 (permalink)
erion Psycho	I have not yet experienced a home pregnancy test that was wrong. I've been present at the use of five of them, and only two of them gave a positive result. These were the two that were used when we were trying to have a baby. They were right. When we called the doctor to set up an appointment, they didn't even want to confirm the home pregnancy tests. They told my wife that they are easily as accurate as the one the hospital would use as long as they are used properly. Follow the directions and that's 'nuff said, I would think.

07-12-2003, 03:11 AM	#9 (permalink)
cheerios Banned Location: 'bout 2 feet from my iMac	yeah, pregnancy test can't hurt. If you're REALLY nervous, she can get tested at her gyno, also.

07-12-2003, 04:53 AM	#11 (permalink)
lurkette My future is coming on Moderator Emeritus Location: east of the sun and west of the moon	I went off the pill briefly about 10 years ago and we used condoms, and I had the same "late period" scare - about the same age, too. I eventually got my period, not before I'd sweated bullets, though. Get the pregnancy tests and good luck to you. __________________ "If ten million people believe a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing." - Anatole France

07-12-2003, 05:52 AM	#14 (permalink)
SiN strangelove Location: ...more here than there...	test! the sooner she finds out, the sooner and better she/you can take any necessary action, etc... __________________ - + - ° GiRLie GeeK ° - + - ° 01110010011011110110111101110100001000000110110101100101 Therell be days/When Ill stray/I may appear to be/Constantly out of reach/I give in to sin/Because I like to practise what I preach

07-12-2003, 05:59 AM	#15 (permalink)
Cynthetiq Tilted Cat Head Administrator Location: Manhattan, NY	plenty of good responses here... __________________ I don't care if you are black, white, purple, green, Chinese, Japanese, Korean, hippie, cop, bum, admin, user, English, Irish, French, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, indian, cowboy, tall, short, fat, skinny, emo, punk, mod, rocker, straight, gay, lesbian, jock, nerd, geek, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, Independent, driver, pedestrian, or bicyclist, either you're an asshole or you're not. What's the best nation in the world? DO-NATION!

07-12-2003, 04:34 PM	#16 (permalink)
Xiphias Crazy	Thanks a lot guys.... The help has been awesome, what an excellent community. I'll grab a few tests, get her to take them. She hates doctors, so this is the best chance for now. I hope more than anything that it is just a scare, and nothing more, i dont know what I'll do if she's pregnant. Does anyone know, per chance, if those abortion tablets are available in Australia on prescription?

07-12-2003, 07:48 PM	#18 (permalink)
Slims Eccentric insomniac Location: North Carolina	If she doesn't get big, then she isn't pregnant. Seriously, the pill can really mess with a girls cycle. I have had girlfriends miss periods when they are on it, and have wierd things happen when they go off. I wouldn't worry about it unless she starts to show other signs of pregnancy, or she doesn't get her period withing the next month. And be sure to remind her that since she might already be pregnant, she has a lower than normal risk of getting pregnant from sex. __________________ "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery." - Winston Churchill "All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T.E. Lawrence

07-12-2003, 08:09 PM	#19 (permalink)
123dsa Crazy Location: KY	Get the tests dude, the sooner you find out the sooner you can decide what to do. Whatever the decision good luck to you.

07-12-2003, 08:35 PM	#20 (permalink)
Xiphias Crazy	Ok... due to the advice of almost everyone, I'm going to get the tests today. I work at a chemist, so I'll pick it up while working.\ DonkeyPuncher - thank you so much for your concern. You have hit the nail on the head in terms of behaviour. Yeh, I need to really support her. Thanks so much for the advice. I really appreciate it. Greg700 - I'd rather not wait till she does get big to find out. And yeh, I will remind her of that fact heh heh heh...

07-13-2003, 12:08 AM	#21 (permalink)
crow_daw Idolator Location: Vol Country	I've had a pregnancy scare before too, but the girl was a total drama queen, so it turned out to be nothing, but I know what its like to be scared out of your mind too. Just stay as calm as possible and get that shit tested. __________________ "We each have a star, all we have to do is find it. Once you do, everyone who sees it will be blinded." - Earl Simmons

07-13-2003, 07:09 PM	#22 (permalink)
smithja0423 Guest	I think pretty much any person who's sexually active has had a pregnancy scare. It's just a fact of life. Being so soon after stopping the pill I wouldn't worry, but taking a pregnancy test sure wouldn't hurt.

07-13-2003, 08:11 PM	#23 (permalink)
Janie Insane Location: Greater Vancouver	First off, the pill is notorious for its effects on a woman's cycle. It works on a cycle of 28 days, which is about average, but many women have shorter or longer natural cycles. Once a woman is off the hormones, it takes time for the body to adjust and return to its natural cycle. Secondly, at 18, many women still have frequent irregularities in their cycle. Thirdly, a change in hormones can and does affect the emotional state of an individual. Coming off the pills would have most likely effected a change in your GF's emotions. It may have made her feel under stress, and that can delay a period. Fourthly, as some other people mentioned, it could be other stress she's experiencing, like finishing school. My bet is on Possibility Number One. If her period is delayed more than about two weeks, get a pregnancy test done. Good luck! __________________ cheers to the motherland

07-13-2003, 08:22 PM	#24 (permalink)
Xiphias Crazy	Thanks Janie. I have two tests, bought em yesterday. I'll give them to her when I see her today. Maybe do one today and one next week

07-13-2003, 09:30 PM	#26 (permalink)
nulltype Crazy	I suspect that Greg's post was made partially in jest.

07-13-2003, 10:21 PM	#27 (permalink)
sub zero Addict Location: The one state that doesn't have black outs: TEXAS BABY!!!	<b>Save yourself the stress</b> and get her checked out by a doctor. __________________ Did you Google it yet? Join the TFP Typing team!!