How comfortable are you in a sexy situation?

[Halx]

You're at a party and people start to get naked.
You're standing next to two gay guys (or girls) making out.
People start fucking right before your very eyes.

How do you react? How do you feel about it?

This is a recurring theme of thought for me because of a party I recently attended. I want people to think about how they would react in a situation where they were suddenly in the middle of a sexually charged environment. Some people would run screaming for the door. Some people would join right in. Well, how would you react and how do you feel about it?

Are you one of those people who would run screaming for the door, but in the back of your mind, you wish that you could have the nerve to stay and even enjoy? Does the thought of other people getting horny just turn you off? Are there things you'd like to see? Could you keep your composure?

Having been in a vaguely similar situation, I didn't react to it how I wanted to. I actually just left when things started to get heavy. I would have liked to stay and observe. It was a test of my nerve and I sorta failed. Don't think I will next time though.

[snowy]

I've been to parties where things like that have happened. I'm not likely to join in any more, given that I take my relationship with my SO seriously and that would be outside of our defined boundaries, but I'm comfortable with other people engaging and just being there on the sidelines. There isn't anything I'd like to see, as in college I saw a lot of sexual happenings at parties. For me, it's sort of a "been there, done that, got the t-shirt" sort of thing. Nudity is still pretty common at some of the parties I attend, but it's not always sexual nudity; more often it's nudity for the sake of being open and comfortable.

[Daval]

How come I never get invited to these parties? Damn!

The closest I've come to is a Sauna party where people are going in and out of a Sauna and Hot Tub while naked but it is not a sexual situation, just people being comfortable with their bodies and each other.

[abaya]

I guess you mean a "sexy situation" involving people outside your central relationship? If so, I agree with Snowy here:

Originally Posted by onesnowyowl

I take my relationship with my SO seriously and that would be outside of our defined boundaries, but I'm comfortable with other people engaging and just being there on the sidelines.

I wouldn't mind going with ktsp while other people were having sex around us, if he felt okay with it. I think it might even be hot to have sex in the corner, with other people doing it in the room around us. The whole live porn effect could turn me on.

But if one or both of us did not feel 100% okay with it, and if we weren't both thoroughly confident in our relationship stability and mutual boundaries, we definitely wouldn't show up in the first place. That would just be asking for trouble. We have always had that agreement between us, and it's a very strong reason for why we haven't put ourselves into any "sexy situations" yet. We may never do so. We may end up doing it all the time, someday. But we are not ready for that, not by a long shot.

We already discussed the whole naked party phenomenon in another thread, no?

[Jinn]

I would stare awkwardly until it became apparent that they were uncomfortable with the stares; once they did, I think I'd feel compelled to leave. If they weren't uncomfortable with the stares, I'd probably just stand there quietly and hope no one noticed me.

I'm much more of a viewer than a participant.

[KellyC]

Having never experienced this, I would not know what to do. I'd like to think that I can stay and watch (definitely not brave enough to partake), but I'll probably stay and be really awkward about the whole situation. Or run...

[Cynthetiq]

The only time I was uncomfortable was when I was participating in the nudity ala sauna in Finland with someone that I had never met in person but only spoke to online.

We were on our honeymoon, Skogafoss doesn't like hot spaces, saunas, spas, hotpots, whirlpools. So she stayed upstairs surfing, while I got naked with a woman I hardly knew and her b/f that I didn't know at all.

It was a bit strange because I didn't understand the protocol, my normal getting naked with anyone else was only for sex. I didn't ever community shower, or if I did it was in/out fast as I could.

But the time I went to a BDSM club with a friend who was interested in trying it out since her husband wasn't. I had a good time watching people get whipped and slapped. Until someone was jerking off on my date's leg, it was all good for all of us. Once that happened tho, I had to tell her to leave, because I had to make sure my friend was okay. I consoled my date later on, but I was lucky she understood that my role was to watch and take care of my friend who was visiting.

It was the beginning of the end for them, as she found out she really liked that lifestyle and he never felt comfortable with it. They were divorced within one year.

[World's King]

It depends...


If it's 'that' type party then I have no choice but to be okay with it.


If it's a family reunion...

[Daniel_]

I'm British, damnit!

I'd fail to notice, unless I was invited to join in, and then I would treat the request on it's merits, assuming that my wife was also present and consenting.

[Redlemon]

Originally Posted by abaya

If so, I agree with Snowy here:I wouldn't mind going with ktsp while other people were having sex around us, if he felt okay with it. I think it might even be hot to have sex in the corner, with other people doing it in the room around us. The whole live porn effect could turn me on.

But if one or both of us did not feel 100% okay with it, and if we weren't both thoroughly confident in our relationship stability and mutual boundaries, we definitely wouldn't show up in the first place.

Exactly how I hope I would react as well. But, I can't imagine getting the opportunity to find out.

[curiousbear]

I will stay for sometime. I dont think I can join in. Which means I cant stay longer. But will feel for not able to be in it. May be if all the people there are total strangers, all married young couples like us, I would enjoy being there. But 100% sure my girl wont like it and would want us to leave

[vanblah]

It really depends on the situation. I have been to and participated in these kinds of parties.

I would almost certainly never be uncomfortable in a situation like the ones you have described.

If, for some reason, I became the attention of some unwanted sexual advances I would simply say, "No thanks." If the attention continued I'd either leave or ask the person to leave.

[Willravel]

I can't imagine "joining in". Seems like an easy way to get hepatitis. I don't know that I'd leave, necessarily, but I'd certainly be less likely to stay if someones were doing the wheelbarrow right in front of me. Not that I have anything against the wheelbarrow.

[shakran]

Originally Posted by Halx

You're at a party and people start to get naked.
You're standing next to two gay guys (or girls) making out.
People start fucking right before your very eyes.

How do you react? How do you feel about it?

Being a photojournalist, my instinct is to grab the camera and start rolling. But that would probably get me killed, or worse. I'd probably leave. I'm comfortable with sexuality, but don't really need to see others being that comfortable in a public situation.

[cadre]

It would depend a lot on the situation, but I usually won't run for the hills. At some parties, I'll join in. But at others I grab a drink and hang out on the couch to watch.

But, I enjoy the single life. If I were in a relationship it would depend on the dynamics of that relationship.

[Jozrael]

I'd love to.

My gf wouldn't (nor want me to).

Thus I wouldn't and I'm ok with that.

[World's King]

Originally Posted by Willravel

I can't imagine "joining in". Seems like an easy way to get hepatitis. I don't know that I'd leave, necessarily, but I'd certainly be less likely to stay if someones were doing the wheelbarrow right in front of me. Not that I have anything against the wheelbarrow.

Remind me to not invite you to any parties.

[genuinegirly]

I'm not much of one for large parties with people that I don't know.
I have been to large parties, populated mainly by people who were neighbors and housemates in college settings.
At these parties, there were people making out on couches, sometimes people dancing naked. I just laughed about it and did my own thing: dancing, singing at the top of my lungs, etc. I never once considered them to be sexy situations. They were people enjoying a party the way they knew best.

I do not think that I would jump in, but no one has encouraged me to do so.

[ASU2003]

This happened to me once, and I handled it like I thought I would. It was the first time I had seen a naked female (the bottom part) at 22. This is a pretty good story, and I'm happy it turned out the way it did.

I was really shy back then, so I get a call from a friend wanting me to come over to his (parents) house at 12:30 at night on a weekend. He didn't say want for, but I thought it was to go swimming in their pool (it was really hot even at night) I found out later that there was a party and 3 girls and two guys were left, including my friend. Well, my friend has me come back to his room were there are three naked girls and one naked guy on the bed. Well, the guy and one of the girls are having sex and the other two girls look board, My jaw hit the floor. I sit down in a chair and watch for a while, until the two girls come over and have me stand to take off my clothes. But nothing major happened for various reasons after that. We touched non-sexually and watched the other couple mostly.

[Anormalguy]

If I was on my own, I'd probably make a gracious exit.

If my wife was with me, I'd gauge her reaction. Unless we knew enough of the people to be reasonably comfortable, chances are we'd leave. But who knows...

[anti fishstick]

given that i often want to run at NORMAL parties, i think i would totally bail on this one. i'd find it intriguing but not comfortable enough to stay. given a time and place though, like if it were a burningman event, and i knew what i was getting in to and mentally prepared, i might try... i'd definitely be braver with my SO there. Though, not sure we're ready for that....

[*Nikki*]

If I were single, no problem.

As long as the people are clean.

[maybird]

I'm curious why that would hurt a relationship? I really have no opinion on it...just curious as to what has to be established between both partners before something like that is positive or good for the relationship?

I've never actually been in a situation like that. My partner is really into that sort of thing. So, I've been considering it more seriously. We are actually going to a place like that this weekend. We've picked out a place and are going to see what happens and how it works out. I'm not sure what to expect. In my mind it seems like fun and that I'd enjoy it. So, I hope I don't react that way. So what kind of boundaries do you think should be established? What should I make sure I talk about before I put myself into a situation like that?

[Martian]

I'm not really interested in that sort of thing. I have no problem with people having those sorts of parties; my policy in general is that so long as you're not hurting anyone else, you should do what makes you happy. At the same time, I'm not interested in attending that type of party myself. It seems kind of gimmicky.

Then again, I'm not much for parties in general, even the fully clothed variety. I suspect that were I invited to a sex party, I would politely decline, and that if it were to develop that way afterwards I'd make my excuses and go on my way. I'm not bothered by the idea of people having sex in public, but I'm not terribly interested in watching and I certainly wouldn't want to participate, so I can't imagine any reason I'd feel compelled to stay.

[RetroGunslinger]

I don't really attend sexual parties... well, hell, any parties for that matter.... but I've been in similar situations and it doesn't bother me. I suppose if it was a really hot display I'd wish I was in on it, but otherwise I'd probably continue about my business, whether that be drinking, dancing, or discussing the works of Kafka.

[curiousbear]

Goodluck Maybird

[Chumley]

I want to think I would join right in. I'm not sure I'd actually have the nuts to....

[digme]

I would definitely hang around and watch. And try to get on the invite list for the next party.

[thespian86]

I usually just sit back and watch and/or hear about it the next day. I've taken part but not the act of sex itself; I've certainly seen my share of things in theatre. People experiment a lot at my age in this line of work. Oh, they drink a lot too.

[Randy]

I'd like to discuss it with my significant other in detail, and make careful arrangements on acceptable and unacceptable practices, before attending said party.

[Redjake]

I would deliver a hot beef injection to all willing parties in a tri-country radius

[Marshie]

That'd be kind of weird for me. I'd pobably observe or leave, wanting to stay, but not having the confidence to...

[belle_enigma]

___________

[Craven Morehead]

Considering that any party I would be attending would have people there around my age, not so much. The last thing I want to see/need to see is a bunch of people in their mid-50s fucking like a bunch of bunnies.

[Iliftrocks]

That'd be awkward. I'd probably just start looking for a bottle of Jameson's and watch some TV until the festivities were over....

[icevrething]

I suppose it would depend on the vibe and people. If they're friendly and acknowledge me, then maybe I'd stay awhile

[Punk.of.Ages]

I've been in many such situations. I'm perfectly comfortable, if not enthusiastic!

Of course, I'm a single fella' far more often than I'm a taken fella'.

[lostgirl]

I've been to a few such parties. At first I was uncomfortable and would be nervous and giggle. Now I just watch and get horny. I am not the sort to join in though, and everyone there seems okay with that as long as I masturbate.

[Strange Famous]

I mean, it depends very much on the gender in that situation.

If Im at a party and two girls start fucking... thats quite interesting.

If Im at a party and two guys t fucking, and an orgy is breaking out, I'm not a prejudiced person but thats not a situation I call sexy or a situation I want to be involved with or even witness, so I would make a sharp exit.

[lostgirl]

It's not like they told me I have to masturbate to stay or they would have kicked me out if I didn't. One of the girls suggested that I do it to help me feel less nervous, she was right.