help me - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

tlsmith821 · 11-19-2008, 11:43 AM

Ok. So I am stuck at work while everyone else is away on a company outing. I work in the lab and still had a few small tests to do and I was chosen to stay all day for what we call firewatch. Well I'm really horny!!! I dont know what to do because I am the only one here so I probably wouldnt get caught if I left but if I left then I may lose my job. What should I do. Any tips....

dlish · 11-19-2008, 11:58 AM

you should stay at work. no doubt. if i was your boss i'd fire you if i left you there for fire watch and you ended up going home

go to the loo, flog the log for a few mins, and then start another thread about how you flogged the log at work when no one was around.

what else do you expect me to say its in the sexuality forum.

ShaniFaye · 11-19-2008, 12:00 PM

how old are you that you need to ask if being horny is a reason to be irresponsible at work?

tlsmith821 · 11-19-2008, 12:10 PM

well Im 21. Ive been with the company for over 3 years and well.....my dad is my boss....I am actually a manager.

Xerxys · 11-19-2008, 01:15 PM

You should go out my friend, the girls love a rebel, hit the town and paint it red!! have a blast!! It's your day!!! I mean you are the manager after all, how bad could it be!!

Vigilante · 11-19-2008, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tlsmith821

well Im 21. Ive been with the company for over 3 years and well.....my dad is my boss....I am actually a manager.

Go beat the meat and get back to work. Takes 5 mins, about the time it takes to take a dump anyways. Been there, done that. Several times actually LOL

The_Jazz · 11-19-2008, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tlsmith821

well Im 21. Ive been with the company for over 3 years and well.....my dad is my boss....I am actually a manager.

Get out of there, go pick up a tranny hooker and bang the shit out of s/him! You only live once!

Or actually earn your paycheck for a change. Your call.

SabrinaFair · 11-19-2008, 05:45 PM

You know, maybe men and women really are different, or maybe it's just me, but I have never been so horny I couldn't wait until I got home....I personally would go back to work and give yourself a treat when you get home.

Tully Mars · 11-19-2008, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The_Jazz

Get out of there, go pick up a tranny hooker and bang the shit out of s/him! You only live once!

Or actually earn your paycheck for a change. Your call.

I nominate this post o'the week.

Vigilante · 11-19-2008, 07:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SabrinaFair

You know, maybe men and women really are different, or maybe it's just me, but I have never been so horny I couldn't wait until I got home....I personally would go back to work and give yourself a treat when you get home.

They are. Trust me. I've been so horny a couple of times that I literally couldn't see straight. Once at work when I felt a sudden attraction to a girl I normally wouldn't have even dated. I was so worked up I nearly fell over just standing there. His issue might be boredom based (get that alot if I'm sitting around at home) or just a random huge surge of testosterone. I know between me and my wife, and for that matter between me and all the girls I've dated, no women have come close to the pure sexual urge men experience. After all, how many stories of men screwing everything they can in seclusion do you hear about, vs women? Horses, sheep, cantaloupe, a jar of jelly with a condom shoved in it, a hollowed out cucumber (poor man's fleshlight?), a muddy hole, themselves and in prison other men. Who normally pursues who at the night club? Who will say anything to get laid? Just some food for thought.

When we don't get laid, it can be downright torturous.

Cernunnos · 11-19-2008, 08:33 PM

Take a trip to the latrine and beat the meat, as luciferase75 so eloquently put it. Then work if you have assignments to finish (or people to manage), and post on TFP when you don't.

Anormalguy · 11-19-2008, 08:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luciferase75

...
After all, how many stories of men screwing everything they can in seclusion do you hear about, vs women? Horses, sheep, cantaloupe, a jar of jelly with a condom shoved in it, a hollowed out cucumber (poor man's fleshlight?), a muddy hole, themselves and in prison other men.....

You left out the crack of dawn.

Note to self--Never, under any circumstances, get trapped on a desert island with Luciferase

.

Apex Shok · 11-19-2008, 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SabrinaFair

You know, maybe men and women really are different, or maybe it's just me, but I have never been so horny I couldn't wait until I got home....I personally would go back to work and give yourself a treat when you get home.

Used to work at a local Hewlett Packard printer manufactuing plant. And there was a select few that had access to the chem. room. I worked in materials on the weekend shifts. So I had to have access to the Chem rooms to stock them for monday morning work. None of the chemists ever came in on the weekends, so those of us who had access would use the Chem rooms as our personal party rooms. In a plant of over 3000 people it was not uncommon to get one of the production honeys to come back and give a quickie every now and then.

Was like one of those moments your not proud of, but at the same time, your glad you did.

Vigilante · 11-20-2008, 12:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anormalguy

Note to self--Never, under any circumstances, get trapped on a desert island with Luciferase

.

LMAO! I never said I used those, but I know people that have. Not the animal bit, but I know a guy that definitely loves him some cantaloupe.

Hey I was a boy scout and I'm like steve erwin and bear grylls love child LOL. I might be useful on a desert island. Just don't drop the coconut.

dlish · 11-20-2008, 01:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by luciferase75

They are. Trust me. I've been so horny a couple of times that I literally couldn't see straight. Once at work when I felt a sudden attraction to a girl I normally wouldn't have even dated. I was so worked up I nearly fell over just standing there. His issue might be boredom based (get that alot if I'm sitting around at home) or just a random huge surge of testosterone. I know between me and my wife, and for that matter between me and all the girls I've dated, no women have come close to the pure sexual urge men experience. After all, how many stories of men screwing everything they can in seclusion do you hear about, vs women? Horses, sheep, cantaloupe, a jar of jelly with a condom shoved in it, a hollowed out cucumber (poor man's fleshlight?), a muddy hole, themselves and in prison other men. Who normally pursues who at the night club? Who will say anything to get laid? Just some food for thought.

When we don't get laid, it can be downright torturous.

this just had to be said...

i cant believe you a cucumber fleshlight

RetroGunslinger · 11-20-2008, 01:51 AM

I'm not sure I've ever been quite so horny as to have to ask if I should leave my job to go do something about it. I guess my question is whether or not this guy has some sort of stable of women at his house waiting for him, 'cause I see no other excuse to not be able to A) wait to get home or B) go to the pot and take a shot.

There, that's my masturbation phrase for the thread. Thank you and good night.

Vigilante · 11-20-2008, 03:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dlish

this just had to be said...

i cant believe you a cucumber fleshlight

ROFL. I assume you meant made one. I'll say it more explicitly: I have not fucked anything mentioned in my posts! I didn't even do the jar of jelly, but I was curious since my high school buds raved on it so much. Hahaha!

11-19-2008, 11:43 AM	#1 (permalink)
tlsmith821 Upright	help me Ok. So I am stuck at work while everyone else is away on a company outing. I work in the lab and still had a few small tests to do and I was chosen to stay all day for what we call firewatch. Well I'm really horny!!! I dont know what to do because I am the only one here so I probably wouldnt get caught if I left but if I left then I may lose my job. What should I do. Any tips....

11-19-2008, 11:58 AM	#2 (permalink)
dlish Currently sour but formerly Dlishs Super Moderator Location: Australia/UAE	you should stay at work. no doubt. if i was your boss i'd fire you if i left you there for fire watch and you ended up going home go to the loo, flog the log for a few mins, and then start another thread about how you flogged the log at work when no one was around. what else do you expect me to say its in the sexuality forum. __________________ An injustice anywhere, is an injustice everywhere I always sign my facebook comments with ()()===========(}. Does that make me gay? - Filthy

11-19-2008, 12:00 PM	#3 (permalink)
ShaniFaye Submit to me, you know you want to Location: Lilburn, Ga	how old are you that you need to ask if being horny is a reason to be irresponsible at work? __________________ *I want the diabetic plan that comes with rollover carbs. I dont like the unused one expiring at midnite!!*

11-19-2008, 05:45 PM	#8 (permalink)
SabrinaFair Junkie Location: Louisville, KY	You know, maybe men and women really are different, or maybe it's just me, but I have never been so horny I couldn't wait until I got home....I personally would go back to work and give yourself a treat when you get home. __________________ "With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy." -Desiderata

11-20-2008, 01:51 AM	#16 (permalink)
RetroGunslinger eats puppies and shits rainbows Location: An Area of Space Occupied by a Population, SC, USA	I'm not sure I've ever been quite so horny as to have to ask if I should leave my job to go do something about it. I guess my question is whether or not this guy has some sort of stable of women at his house waiting for him, 'cause I see no other excuse to not be able to A) wait to get home or B) go to the pot and take a shot. There, that's my masturbation phrase for the thread. Thank you and good night. __________________ It's a rare pleasure in this world to get your mind fucked. Usually it's just foreplay. M.B. Keene

11-19-2008, 12:10 PM	#4 (permalink)
tlsmith821 Upright	well Im 21. Ive been with the company for over 3 years and well.....my dad is my boss....I am actually a manager.

11-19-2008, 01:15 PM	#5 (permalink)
Xerxys Junkie Location: My head.	You should go out my friend, the girls love a rebel, hit the town and paint it red!! have a blast!! It's your day!!! I mean you are the manager after all, how bad could it be!!

11-19-2008, 08:33 PM	#11 (permalink)
Cernunnos Insane Location: Orlando, Florida	Take a trip to the latrine and beat the meat, as luciferase75 so eloquently put it. Then work if you have assignments to finish (or people to manage), and post on TFP when you don't.