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Survival 1000 years ago
I was reading this blog post and thought it might be fun to see what people here would say about it:
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Personally I think we'd all be fucked. Might do alright until contact with people is made. Once that happens I'm guessing we'd all be burned at the stake as witches. Just a guess though.
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Be a mute.
Strip naked. Keep your knife. |
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I'd like to be in the UK, that way I at least have a shot at understanding people. Then I'd commit the most incredible acts of plagiarism and copyright infringement ever. I'd invent everything and become a multimillionaire, then I'd ruin history.
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Yeah could always go the other way for you.
From Monty Python and the Holy Grail: Who's that then? I dunno, must be a king. Why? He hasn't got shit all over him |
I've read the SAS Survival Handbook by Lofty Wiseman, and am working on learning to identify plants for foraging purposes. Personally, I think that knowledge would come in handy were I transported 1000 years into the past. I've also read Diana Gabaldon's Outlander series, and so I have an inkling of what it would be like to transported to an entirely different time.
One thing I would think would shock me would be the hygiene. |
I'm with Will. I'd totally have to just invent everything and then sit back and let the smelly, hairy babes grace me... hell, maybe I'd even invent my own religion just for shits and giggles.
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You could roll the dice, but I don't think that would be good from a survival perspective. Have you heard of the term "Instrument of the Devil"? |
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I think if this ever happened, I would try to blend in and simply use my superior to knowledge to try and duck out of bad situations. There, that's my boring answer, as opposed to my fun one. |
heh. You'd need to feed yourself, clothe yourself, communicate with other people and find a place to stay. How easily do you think you could do that before you had a chance to invent and write? and in a largely illiterate non-technological society, that sort of stuff would be useless to you without a patron, which means you'd need to get in to see the local lord somehow, and convince him to take you under his wing.
Bottom line: I don't think any of us would do too well. |
Yeah, especially considering that even as late as the Middle Ages, peasants between local districts couldn't understand one another for local dialects.
Just one of the many ways lord held onto their power. How would a modern English-speaker fare? Um, you'd be mistaken for a foreigner. The English might think you were French and vice versa. Depending on the year you land on, this could be either bad or catastrophic. |
Lets assume you arrive, unlike the "Terminator," with your clothes. At best you're going to stand out. At worst it's going to be seen as evil and the results likely not good. Even if you got a pass on your clothes, language would be nearly impossible. Within a day you'd need clean water and within a few days food would be an issue. I think your days would be filled with feeding yourself and keeping yourself hydrated.
But for the fun of it what would be your first "invention?" Myself, if I were in a village of some sort, I think I'd be working on some sort of "sanitation system." A septic tank is a really simply concept. |
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Step 1: Become a doctor Step 2: Cure basically everything by adopting the use of basic medicine Step 3: Use riches to buy baron status Step 4: Use modern economics and agriculture, develop the most wealthy surfs Step 5: Become a member of the king's court Step 6: Design policy Step 7: Marry the king's daughter Step 8: Teach the king's daughter about bathing (actually, reverse those) Step 9: Become king Step 10: Kick it |
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Not to stereotype, but Occam's razor really doesn't get much play here on TFP, does it? People here try to find the most complex solutions to the simplest problems.
I'm standing by my original reply. Oh yeah, keep your modern knife hidden from the locals. |
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I gotta ask... Since you're going to be nakid... where planing on hiding the knife? |
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Hang onto your clothing until you find other people and stash everything together or if you're surrounded by natives then strip quick and hide the knife in the piles of filth around the town. Get native garb and return to your trusty blade. A pair of Redwing boots would go far in 1008 if you had to flee on foot. edit: of course, at 6'0", 190lbs I'd stick out like a sore thumb no matter what. |
Learning a classical language before you went time-travelling would probably help. I have, because I am endlessly geeky, often fantasized about what would happen should I somehow end up 1000 years ago. It made me feel better once I mastered Hebrew and learned Latin, Middle English, Saxon, and picked up a little Greek and a little Old French. If I ended up back there, I could always pass myself off as a scholar. I also learned how to fight with a broadsword-- it's not the commonest hobby, I know, but it is fun-- and that might help, too. Plus, I can shoot (archery), though I'm not the greatest.
Will's ideas are actually not bad at all. People back then actually did not go around constantly burning everyone who spouted weird stuff, if for no other reason than they generally were too busy trying to survive. Mastering some basic herbology, pharmacology, and field medicine before one went jaunting back in time would probably be the best course of action: successful healers wrote their own tickets back then, and lords were willing to pay well for their services. Whether one could end up getting rich enough to marry royalty...that might be a different matter. But one could end up getting rich enough to live fairly well. Maybe even purchasing a title and lands. Also, if one were perhaps slightly more flexible in one's ethics, a little basic knowledge of chemistry, physics, and weapons design could earn one an excellent living as a provider of military technology to a lord or king. Without pre-existing language skills, and some helpful knowledge with which to make a living, if you got tossed back 1000 years, it would be mighty difficult to survive long enough to learn the languages and figure out a trade. |
I'd be hoping I remember my high school Latin and the formulas for making penicillin and gunpowder. Otherwise, I think I might be in trouble. Neither modern English or French would be a lot of help 1000 years ago, English didn't really sound like English until almost Shakespeare's time.
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I'm a big fan of Occam's razor but I think once you're nude the logic of Occam switches to the the locals. Simplest solution for them is to do away with you and go back to their lives. Quote:
I give you the most likely to succeed award. Knowledge of the lingo will take you far, I'm learning this the hard way right now. Might want to bone up on history as well. Wouldn't want to show in 1080 and start speaking Old French or French-Norman while in Britannia. The Normans weren't real popular there for a few hundred years starting around that time. I think you'd do better if you were dropped in a large city such as London. Easier to blend in, esp if you were able to communicate. Also might want to bone up on historical medical condition and illnesses. You're likely going to be carrying germs they can't fight off and they're going to be doing the same. |
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I hope you enjoy swallowing astrology among other things while becoming a medieval physician. Even if you get that far, I doubt you could bring medicine "up to speed" within your lifetime. I think your attempts would have you tortured and executed. Why not also tell them that the earth isn't the centre of the universe and how it's physically possible to touch the stars? Will, have you not studied medieval history in any capacity? I'm sorry if I sound pessimistic; I'm just concerned about your safety. |
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Also, Will, bear in mind that you'll be lacking the basic infrastructure you'll need to pursue modern medicine. I assume you'll be able to make some bread mold pretty easily, but then you'll have to extract the penicillin (bread mold by itself will make people sick) - how are you going to do that? You'll need sterile equipment for many applications. You'll need - at the very least - metallurgy, plastics (go find petroleum to make plastic from), distillation, chemical processing facilities........... is it any wonder doctors were using leeches before the advent of mass production? For the first vaccination - smallpox, in (I think) the 1790s - Edward Jenner actually put liquid out of smallpox pustules into healthy patients to innoculate them. That's a high risk vaccination, right?
Until you do figure these things out, you'll need to feed and clothe yourself. I suppose you could go to the nearest abbey and request the protection and help of the bishop, but how long could you do that? |
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"The far East." Credentials likely were not an issue back in 1008 AD. Quote:
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As for the burned at the stake thing? The end of the Dark Ages are probably not the ideal time to be alive, yeah. The church is still running rampant, and it'd still be a few years before the Renaissance (where new ideas would be more welcome). Quote:
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I suppose, after I've gained wealth and such, I could leave the US and start a colony in the US or Canada (or what would eventually be the US or Canada). I could even end up saving the Native Americans (though I'd have to be careful not to bring European illnesses with me). Quote:
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Why don't y'all become anthropologists and head down to those newly-"discovered" people groups in the Amazon... did anyone hear about those in the news last week or two? Anthropologists (or missionaries) who used to go into those kinds of villages stood a good chance of being shot with an arrow at first sight. (They were photographed aiming arrows up at the plane, during the flyover... poor people, must have freaked them out badly.) That will put you back 1,000 years.
There's a reason I do urban fieldwork. :thumbsup: |
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actually, if you claim to be an alchemist, you might be able to get a fair amount of stuff done. Of course you'd need a book of secrets, and you'd have to fast and act all pious for a while, but after a couple of transmutations you'd be famous and very much in demand.
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I wouldn't stand against their superstitions and such, but I wouldn't feed them either. That goes against my own personal code. I'd probably just use deflection.
"How did you heal that guy?" "He wasn't all that sick. Wanna go get a hoagie?" "Hoagie?! WITCH!" |
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I think I'd be OK.
I know the land, I know the safe foods etc. I can make soap and gunpowder from first principles, I can build a furnace, a still, can work iron and case harden it to make tools in advance of a lot of what was around at the time, can cut glass, work with lead. I can make a bow and arrows, a spear, given enough matal I can make a sword or a knife. I can use all of these weapons with reasonable competence. If I was dumped in England 1000 years ago (i.e. 1008) I'd head for Westminster and get a job on the abbey. |
I would probably be mauled by wild animals or killed by the villagers within the first 24 hours.
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german maybe ... but do you speak Middle High German? Wie sol ich den ritter nû gescheiden und daz schœne wîp die dicke bî ein ander lâgen ê? dâ rât ich in rehten triuwen beiden und ûf mîn selbes lîp daz sie sich scheiden und er dannen gê. mâze ist zallen dingen guot. lîp und êre ist unbehuot, ob man iht langer lît. ichn singe eht anders niht wan: ez ist zît. stant ûf, ritter!' |
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I'm with you. I think the survival rate, regardless of how smart you are, would be nil. I'm sure I wouldn't last long. |
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what are first principles? Quote:
hehe... Caecilius ego sum... |
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Willravel would be dead inside a week, witches and heretics are not tolerated. Daniel might survive as his ego isnt quite so inflated.
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Nostrodmus made a simple mistake: he didn't argue from scripture. While the act of Jesus cleaning his disciples' feet was clearly an allegory for humility and service of leadership, one could also argue from this teaching the holy nature of cleanliness.
The main issue I'd have would be gaining access to the Bible, as it was not widely distributed at the time. I'd probably have to become a priest of some kind. |
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back then, cleanliness was not next to godliness. my understanding of the time is that it was believed that washing frequently was a bad thing, showed excessive pride or something, for soem reason was against god. but more importantly, by 1000AD, the church had little to worry about with islam for another 400 or 500 years. they'd been stopped in western europe in the mid-700's by charles martel at tours/poiters. eastern europe was orthodox, so not the pope's concern, and muslim expansion there was still being halted by the romans (byzantines). so they'd have plenty of time to burn your heretic butt. :) |
Everyone involved in this thread should pause to read "The Year 1000" by Robert Lacey. The assumption that Anglo Saxon Britain was simply a barbaric backwater could not be further from the truth. The Saxons were a very pragmatic people, if you had knowlege that could help them, they would very likely welcome you with open arms.
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Or Anglos...
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Obtuse.
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Will could survive by finding forward-thinking men like Frederick II and supporting his causes with his advanced knowledge, which I'm sure would have impressed him. |
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lack of survival skills aside (how many of us could actually survive in the wilderness on our own for any real length of time?), the language barrier really would be the biggest short term problem. if this scenario really happened, feigning muteness would possibly be a smart idea...
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He can invent the printing press! |
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Also, I never said I'd pursue an atheist agenda. The world has really only been ready for that for maybe the past few hundred years, at most the Renaissance. I can play ball if it means avoiding persecution from a church. HH has a good idea with muteness, but not understanding would mean pretending to be mentally handicapped. Who knows what they did with people afflicted with a mental disability. |
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Nobility was not doomed to live an illiterate life, pocon, which could be my "in". Find a low-level noble and provide him with what was essentially the key to the church, and things could get shaken up.
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Willravel: What can he not do?
Seriously though, if any of us were magically transported to the year 1000 we'd have a very rough time surviving. The middle ages were a rough time, and around the year 1000 A.D you'd be about 100-150 years away from any sort of major intellectual revival. Power was decentralized, and life was about survival. The muslims were going through a practical golden age while the Europeans were in many ways still recovering from the collapse of the Romans 600 years prior. |
I posed this Q to my wife, who stated that as a Chinese woman, she would be quickly detected and either chattled or killed. That surprised me. Would European society be so xenophobic? But then earlier posts re the ownership of records buy the church ring true.
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I think noone of us would do well 1000 years ago.
The language barrier is one point and an important point. Another point is the general behaviour, society has chanced a lot. I don't know what those people would do to someone who talk and acts in a strange way. Hunting may be prohibited in most areas, poaching may be punished harshly. So what kind of job can we do? most of our current jobs are useless (I work in the IT buisness ...) but even most crafting jobs will be useless because things will be done in a much different way. Most workers today rely on modern machines which will not be available. Only people who are trained in classic craftsmanship will stand a chance (and by trained I mean trained, not "I've done some blacksmithing in my backyard") So, I don't think it wil be easy, I think most of us will end somewere as an unskilled worker who has to do heavy labor. It may be possible to do some academic work (math perhaps) but I don't think it will be easy to get "into" those jobs. Medicine is difficult, I know how to deal with normal, small wounds, but I have no clue how to treat illness or how to make drugs. I know some Talhoffer and other swordfighting moves (mostly japanese though), don't know if that would help me... |
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You could also work for merchants as an accountant to keep track of goods, ships, caravans, and money. All you need is an abacus, a quill, an inkwell, and some paper. You might have to work as a grunt first before they realize you were educated enough to do more intelligent tasks. |
much would depend on where you landed.
mostly, europe in the early 11th century would probably have been a dismal backwater. think song of roland. yuck. there is this society of creative anachronism thing, which enables folk to imagine that because every bourgeois is so special that fate would decree they projected backward in time as an aristocrat-type and so would be able to mobilize their serfs for sessions of whacking and dismembering and maybe even, if the timing was right, a vast exercise in collective futility like a crusade. but this is a dismal period. pre 11th century renaissance--pre-aquinas, pre-ockham. better to land in what is now iraq. way way better. |
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The only real issue with this would be if you're a woman. Unfortunately, at this time there were really very few places in the world where you could expect to be treated with respect. The only real possibility I can think of would be to see if you can cross the Atlantic and settle in with Native Americans. |
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I would dress like a clown and do the robot dance until someone smashed my head in.
I may or may not have cymbals on the insides of my knees. |
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Giant Hamburger would outlast us all due to his ability to fly.
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Actually, children in that use would be "liberi". Well look at that, I actually do know a little latin!
And in the year 1000, a 24 year old would be middle-aged, not a child. |
This is full forpampred and forlived. It y mowe forleten.
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If we arrived in the year M (that's how it would have been written in Europe back then) we'd be immediately suspect for having all our teeth.
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Ooooh, British, of course!
I mean, come on. He just described James Bond. |
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Back to the OP, I would awe them with my clever physical comedy and impressive physique - no language abilities necessary. |
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