Social Anxiety Made Me Who I am?
 

There are a few active threads on this board right now about dealing with being introverted, shy, and having social anxiety but this one is slightly different. I've been trying to get the balls to visit a therapist and discuss a treatment. I've thought about this alot, probably half the day, every day for a month. Maybe it's just another thing I'm paranoid about, but it seems to me that my social anxiety really played a part in determining my views on politics, religion, etc.. I seem to have views that are the mostly fair and equal, my beliefs are more logical than personal. It seems that my fear of confrontation has shaped my thoughts and opinions over the years. I like my views and opinions, if I were to "get better" how would my opinions change? I don't want them to change - I like my views. It would suck to find out everything I thought I believed in was just a product of my fears.

I dunno if this makes any sense..

As part of a couple whose partner has had diagnosed panic/anxiety disorder, I would say your views would not change as you have them when you are in your comfort zone and they dont change when out of it, so therefore, getting therapy to make you more comfortable in company would only expand your opinions and options not completely change them.....if you get what I mean

I think you are making excuses not to go get help, trying to rationalize your own resistance with the idea that getting better will somehow change you for the worse.

Go see a therapist and see how one can help and put all this behind you.

Generally as a person ages, their views on life and world events change. Life experience is what will effect your views. Doesn't make what you beleived originally to be was wrong, your perception of it changed. Change is a good thing.

Not wanting your views to change is more of a problem than being introverted is. A person who doesn't want their views to change is often very narrowminded and wont listen to other points of view. Think Archie Bunker without the charm of Carol O'Connor or the comedic writing of Norman Lear.

Mal, Being accepting and tolerant of other's opinions is one of my traits that I fear losing. Maybe I should have worded that differently. I value my views and opinions, and they do evolve and change over time. I just keep thinking, Anxiety has pretty much shaped all my opinions. The problem is, even though they are good, fair views(imo, lol) they are formed from fear, What happens when that fear is gone? I don't want to be shaped by irrational fear, but I also don't want to stop caring about opinions that are currently important to me.

This probably reads like total nonsense and stupidity. I think I'm going frickin crazy.

I don't understand how a tolerant view can be manifested through fear? Please give examples of a "view" or two and how you think this view was forged from fear...

Can you explain how your fear of confrontation has shaped your political views?

Also, I second (third, fourth?) the opinions that you should get yourself to therapy. I say this as someone who has gone to therapy for 2+ years, and benefited greatly from it. There is really nothing to lose, and so much to gain. Do yourself and everyone else in your life a favor (I say that with humility, because I have only seen how my lack of therapy hurt people around me) and sign up for some weekly counseling. Take strength in the fact that you are far from being alone in trying counseling. I respect people far more if I know they have tried to improve themselves in this manner.

:thumbsup: for therapy!

Cybermike, from my experience, your views wont change... but you will feel more confident to express them. ;)

Worst case scenario, if you are forced to re-think a view, you will will also have/find the self-confidence to approach it, where at the moment you are even scared to approach yourself.

You are right when you want to fix your fear-based approach, trust yourself...

Do you want to have your beliefs and opinions based on negative emotions (fear, anxiety, shyness) or on positive emotions (love, confidence)? Picture two guys who are both polite and tolerant and gentle and stuff like that. One of them is like that because he's afraid other people will hurt him unless he's like that, and the other is like that because he wants to, he could be a total asshole but he chooses to be nice because he generally likes mankind and wants to make the world a better place for everyone. Who do you want to be? Who do you think is the happiest?