03-08-2004, 10:16 AM | #1 (permalink) |
Crazy
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A Blonde, a Brunette, and a Redhead...
...are all driving during a huge storm. Eventually the storm gets so bad they have to pull over to the side of the road and look for shelter. Since they are out in the middle of the country they can only find a big red barn so even though they would be trespassing they go in anyways.
After a while, they notice the farmer comming straight towards the barn with his pitchfork so all three girls sneak into burlap sackls to hide. The farmer gets to the barn and starts poking around to make sure no one is in his barn. He pokes the bag with the Redhead and she says "Bow Wow, Woof!" "Oh there must be a dog in that bag" Says the farmer. He pokes the bag with the Brunette in it and she says "Meow, Meow" "Oh, there must be a cat inside." The farmer goes to the bag that the blonde is in, starts poking and she says "POTATOS, POTATOS!" |
03-21-2004, 02:33 AM | #9 (permalink) |
Femme Fatale
Location: Elysium
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funny!
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I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust. Something horrible is happening inside of me and I don't know why. My nightly bloodlust has overflown into my days. I feel lethal, on the verge of frenzy. I think my mask of sanity is about to slip. |
10-19-2004, 02:42 AM | #10 (permalink) |
Upright
Location: Newcastle, Australia
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There is a blonde joke I like:
An aeroplane pilot is talking about the "sites of attraction". And to our left you can see the Princess Highway runing alongside the Chaplin's Meteor impact site. The crater is 35m deep and 300m wide. "Wow", says a blonde in front, "that only just missed the highway." Boom Boom. |
10-19-2004, 03:02 AM | #11 (permalink) |
Crazy
Location: UK
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My current favourite blonde joke:
80,000 blondes meet for the annual "Blondes Are Not Stupid Convention!" Jessica Simpson (the guest speaker) gets up and says: "We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?" A blonde gingerly works her way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. Jessica asks her, "What is 5 plus 5?" After 15 or 20 seconds she says, "Eighteen!" Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then 80,000 blondes start cheering, "Give her another chance! Give her another chance!" Jessica says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 80,000 of you in one place and we have the world-wide press and global broadcastmedia here, gee, uh, I guess we can give her another chance." So he asks, "What is 3 plus 2?" After nearly 30 seconds she eventually says, "Ninety?" Jessica is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh -- everyone is disheartened -- the blonde starts crying and the 80,000 girls begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, "GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!" Jessica, unsure whether or not she is doing more harm than damage, eventually says, "Ok! Ok! Just one more chance -- What is 2 plus 2?" The girl closes her eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, "Four?". Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 80,000 girls jump to their feet, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream... "GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!"
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and so ends the thought process for another day... |
10-20-2004, 03:36 PM | #14 (permalink) |
"Without the fuzz"
Location: ..too close for comfort..
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lol i think i pissed myself :P
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Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps. Play with each other. Play with yourselves. Just don't play with the squirrels, they bite. |
Tags |
blonde, brunette, redhead |
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