Jack Handey Quote of the Day 9-26-04
 

More from "Fuzzy Memories"

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One Thanksgiving my parents did something I don't know if I can ever forgive them for. We were eating our turkey dinner when suddenly I realized I hadn't seen my pet turkey all day. "Where's Mister Gobble?" I asked.
Dad seemed confused. "Mister Gobble?"
"Yes," I said. "My turkey. The one I picked out at the supermarket, and then after he thawed out I made him do a funny little turkey dance. Mister Gobble.
Dad's silence said it all. We were eating Mister Gobble! I ran crying from the table and locked myself in my room.
Later, Dad knocked on the door and said he had some dessert for me. When I opened the door, I couldn't believe it. It was a slice of Pumpkie, my pet pie!

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I only played hooky one time, so I'll never forget it. I hid in the bushes right outside my classroom. And since the window was open, I could hear the teacher, so I went ahead and took notes. When the teacher asked a question, I raised my hand, but she couldn't see me.

That second one is ridiculous... And that's why I love it!

Thanks for continuing to post these.

That reminds me of a Harry Enfield sketch. Some of it's visual, so I'll do my best:

"I hear this horrible ringing sometimes that just carries on and on. It drives me insane and I don't know what to do. It only stops when I pick this up (picks up the receiver on a telephone). But then the voices start."

Sorry, it works better if you see it.

I laughed at it ........didnt you hear?

Hahaha, the second one is gold!

Some people ain't right

Haha! Love the humor!

oh noes, pumpkie is dead!