Jack Handey Quote of the Day 9-18-04
 

More from "Fuzzy Memories" catch-up!

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One year Dad decided he was going to take us on a "surprise vacation." We wouldn't know where we were until we got there. We were all real excited when we piled into the station wagon early one morning. We went about five blocks, then we got in an accident at a four-way stop.
I guess it was a pretty good surprise, but why did we need all that camping gear?

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I'll never forget my first true love. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. From her dark, raven hair to her slender, yellow, scaly feet, she was all woman. She loved corn, and could eat it all day with her hard, yellowish lips. "Caw!" she would yell, as a joke, then flap her arms with delight.
One day, she was sitting on a fence, and some guy shot her.

That reminds me of one of my favorite Deep Thoughts:

"The crow seemed to be calling my name," thought Caw.