Muslim Quaterback. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Glad-I-Ate-Her · 02-12-2004, 07:58 PM

The coach had put together the perfect team for the Detroit Lions. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.

Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.

KABOOM!

He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.

KA-BLOOEY!

Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.

BULLS-EYE!

"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"

So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Lions go on to win the Super Bowl. The young Afghan is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"

"I don't want to talk to you, the old Muslim woman says. "You deserted us. You are not my son!"

"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."

"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!" The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says, "I will never forgive you for making us move to Detroit!"

Glad

sillygirl · 02-12-2004, 08:17 PM

Oh, that's just bad...

KellyC · 02-12-2004, 10:01 PM

hahahahaahaa...oh man...i thought they still live in afghan for a minute there.

(Afghan have chimey???????)

Slacks_01 · 02-12-2004, 10:02 PM

the punchline was just unexpected, but i chuckled

FishKing · 02-12-2004, 10:54 PM

The sad part is that it is about true.

Ferrari · 02-13-2004, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Glad-I-Ate-Her
"I've won the greatest sporting event in the world.

Greatest sporting event my ass!

dannyboy21 · 02-14-2004, 05:39 AM

lol....
rude one, i like it

nice post!

Gortexfogg · 02-14-2004, 10:43 AM

Heh, nice ending, thanks!

datroyenschwart · 02-14-2004, 11:42 AM

This one is send-to-dad-worthy.

datroyenschwart · 02-14-2004, 11:44 AM

Why do Jews make the best blitzing linebackers? (I'm Jewish, don't send me hate mail)

A blitzing linebacker's job is to get the quarter back.

02-12-2004, 07:58 PM	#1 (permalink)
Glad-I-Ate-Her Junkie Location: 1 mile from Ground Zero	Muslim Quarterback. The coach had put together the perfect team for the Detroit Lions. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win. Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away. KABOOM! He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney. KA-BLOOEY! Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph. BULLS-EYE! "I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!" So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Lions go on to win the Super Bowl. The young Afghan is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother. "Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!" "I don't want to talk to you, the old Muslim woman says. "You deserted us. You are not my son!" "I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans." "No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!" The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says, "I will never forgive you for making us move to Detroit!" Glad __________________ I'm "Glad I Ate Her" because the payback was worth it!! Last edited by Glad-I-Ate-Her; 02-12-2004 at 09:06 PM..

02-12-2004, 08:17 PM	#2 (permalink)
sillygirl Newlywed Location: at home	Oh, that's just bad... __________________ Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly-Rose Franken ....absence makes me miss him more...

02-12-2004, 10:01 PM	#3 (permalink)
KellyC Comment or else!! Location: Home sweet home	hahahahaahaa...oh man...i thought they still live in afghan for a minute there. (Afghan have chimey???????) __________________ Him: Ok, I have to ask, what do you believe? Me: Shit happens.

02-14-2004, 11:42 AM	#9 (permalink)
datroyenschwart Tilted Location: North Carolina (college)	This one is send-to-dad-worthy. __________________ Every day that I am alive is a great day. Life is filled with potential and love is everywhere.

02-14-2004, 11:44 AM	#10 (permalink)
datroyenschwart Tilted Location: North Carolina (college)	Why do Jews make the best blitzing linebackers? (I'm Jewish, don't send me hate mail) A blitzing linebacker's job is to get the quarter back. __________________ Every day that I am alive is a great day. Life is filled with potential and love is everywhere.

02-12-2004, 10:02 PM	#4 (permalink)
Slacks_01 Tilted	the punchline was just unexpected, but i chuckled

02-12-2004, 10:54 PM	#5 (permalink)
FishKing Tilted	The sad part is that it is about true.

02-14-2004, 05:39 AM	#7 (permalink)
dannyboy21 Insane	lol.... rude one, i like it nice post!

02-14-2004, 10:43 AM	#8 (permalink)
Gortexfogg I and I Location: Stillwater, OK	Heh, nice ending, thanks!