Just a joke. - Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community

Nanz · 01-26-2004, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Sheila, the Aussie housewife got out of the shower and slipped over on the bathroom floor. Instead of slipping over forwards or backwards, she slipped, did the splits and suctioned herself to the floor. She yelled out for her husband Bruce. "Bruce, Bruce" she yelled. Bruce came running in. "Bruce, I've bloody suctioned myself to the floor" she said.
"Strewth" Bruce said and tried to pull her up. "You're stuck fast girl. I'll go across the road and get Cobba" (his mate). They came back and they both tried to pull her up.
"No way. We can't do it, let's try Plan B." Cobba said
"Plan B?" exclaimed Bruce. "What's that"?
"I'll go home and get my hammer and chisel and we can break the tiles under her and release the vacuum." replied Cobba
"Spot on" Bruce said. "While you're doing that, I'll stay here and play with her tits."
"Play with her tits"? Cobba said, "Not exactly a good time for that mate?"
"No" Bruce replied, "But I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles aren't so expensive".

first topic btw,
hope you like it

edmos1 · 01-26-2004, 11:50 AM

haha good plan

chewybaca96 · 01-26-2004, 11:54 AM

Reese · 01-26-2004, 12:14 PM

hahaha I love it!

GTO · 01-26-2004, 07:31 PM

that was bloody funny

bigbad · 01-27-2004, 04:10 AM

Hadn't heard that one before, thanks

Gortexfogg · 01-27-2004, 06:28 AM

Hehe, good one!

clifclav · 01-27-2004, 08:48 AM

thats a hell of a split

blaze · 01-27-2004, 08:54 AM

hahaha very nice

lrsurfer · 01-27-2004, 02:17 PM

funny stuff there u say

indiretto · 01-30-2004, 11:07 PM

Right funny that one is

SofaKing · 02-01-2004, 11:20 AM

HAAHAHAHAHHAHA, ive never heard that one before, and I expect to be telling that one for weeks, you are beautiful.

Glad-I-Ate-Her · 02-01-2004, 01:08 PM

Good one!!

Glad

Drider_it · 02-02-2004, 04:41 AM

omg that is so wrong in so many ways.. i dare say i laughed heh.. but still.. good one

01-26-2004, 11:54 AM	#3 (permalink)
chewybaca96 We can't stop here! This is bat country! Location: SL,UT	haha __________________ Brian: “Ok, all we’ve gotta do is find the American Embassy, and they’ll help us get home” Stewie: “Home? I have no intention of returning to that disgusting hovel with that intolerable woman, that fat slob, and that insufferable dog… Oh, you’re right here aren’t you? Oh well, I stand by it."

01-26-2004, 12:14 PM	#4 (permalink)
Reese Delicious	hahaha I love it! __________________ “It is better to be rich and healthy than poor and sick” - Dave Barry

01-26-2004, 07:31 PM	#5 (permalink)
GTO Upright Location: Rockin Up The Big Stuff	that was bloody funny __________________ "Avant Garde is French for Bullshit"

01-27-2004, 08:48 AM	#8 (permalink)
clifclav absolute relativist Location: D.C.	thats a hell of a split __________________ Neither rain , nor cold, nor dark of night shall.......ahh whatever, just get me a beer!

01-30-2004, 11:07 PM	#11 (permalink)
indiretto Tilted Location: USA, Oregon	Right funny that one is __________________ Happy Tree Friends... It’s more fun than a stick.

01-26-2004, 11:50 AM	#2 (permalink)
edmos1 Daddy Location: Right next door to Hell	haha good plan

01-27-2004, 04:10 AM	#6 (permalink)
bigbad Insane	Hadn't heard that one before, thanks

01-27-2004, 06:28 AM	#7 (permalink)
Gortexfogg I and I Location: Stillwater, OK	Hehe, good one!

01-27-2004, 08:54 AM	#9 (permalink)
blaze Insane Location: In a van, down by the river	hahaha very nice

01-27-2004, 02:17 PM	#10 (permalink)
lrsurfer Banned	funny stuff there u say

02-01-2004, 11:20 AM	#12 (permalink)
SofaKing Tilted	HAAHAHAHAHHAHA, ive never heard that one before, and I expect to be telling that one for weeks, you are beautiful.

02-01-2004, 01:08 PM	#13 (permalink)
Glad-I-Ate-Her Junkie Location: 1 mile from Ground Zero	Good one!! Glad __________________ I'm "Glad I Ate Her" because the payback was worth it!!

02-02-2004, 04:41 AM	#14 (permalink)
Drider_it Junkie Location: Louisiana	omg that is so wrong in so many ways.. i dare say i laughed heh.. but still.. good one __________________ It means only one thing, and everything: Cut. Once committed to fight, Cut. Everything else is secondary. Cut. That is your duty, your purpose, your hunger. There is no rule more important, no commitment that overrides that one. Cut. The lines are a portrayal of the dance. Cut from the void, not from bewilderment. Cut the enemy as quickly and directly as possible. Cut with certainty. Cut decisively, resoultely. Cut into his strength. Flow through the gaps in his guard. Cut him. Cut him down utterly. Don't allow him a breath. Crush him. Cut him without mercy to the depth of his spirit. It is the balance to life: death. It is the dance with death. It is the law a war wizard lives by, or he dies.