Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community  

Go Back   Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community > Interests > Tilted Humor


 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 01-17-2008, 07:02 AM   #1 (permalink)
let me be clear
 
ottopilot's Avatar
 
Location: Waddy Peytona
Drinking shots with dad

A man walks into a bar with what appeared to be a human head under his arm. As it turned out, it was his son who was born without a body. It was his son's 21st birthday and they came to celebrate with a few drinks. The father walks up to the bar, places his son on the bar and says, "bartender, it's my son's 21st birthday and we're gonna have a first father/son drink. Set us up with 2 shots of Maker's!"

The father holds the shot glass to his son's lips, "here boy, happy birthday!". The son drank the shot and his face reacted to the strong bourbon, then something bizarre happened. He began shaking violently, bouncing and vibrating across the bar until ...POOF! Two arms, shoulders and a neck shot out beneath his head. This was a miracle!

Excited, the dad yelled, "bartender, lets get this young man another round and see what happens!"

So he gives the son the next shot. They waited for about 30 seconds until his son began shaking and vibrating again, until ...POOF! Hips, 2 legs and feet shot out from beneath his shoulders! Indeed, this was miraculous!

By then, a crowd had gathered and they began chanting, "go for the torso! Go for the torso!". The father looked at his son and asked if he wanted to try again to complete the transformation. Excited with hope, the son gladly agreed to go for it.

"Bartender! This "man" needs another round!", demanded the father.

The crowd was silent... anticipation high... magic was in the air.

The father hands the son the shot and he gulps it down. It wasn't long until the shaking began again. Except this time, it was intensely violent. He started foaming at the mouth and smoke was rising from his hair. He was flopping about like he was having a major seizure until ...POOF! He disappeared.

Stunned, the father dropped to his knees and cried. As he knelt, sobbing on the floor where only a charred stain remained of his poor son, he turned to the bartender and asked, "Why has God taken my only son? I loved him so! He's all I had! I was only trying to help him, what did I do wrong".

The bartender threw a towel over his shoulder, leaned over the bar, and said "Buddy, I see this all the time. You should have quit while he was a head."
__________________
"It rubs the lotion on Buffy, Jodi and Mr. French's skin" - Uncle Bill from Buffalo
ottopilot is offline  
Old 01-17-2008, 10:02 PM   #2 (permalink)
Future Bureaucrat
 
KirStang's Avatar
 
:ahem:

GROAN!
KirStang is offline  
Old 01-17-2008, 11:52 PM   #3 (permalink)
Insane
 
...
rlbond86 is offline  
Old 01-18-2008, 10:38 AM   #4 (permalink)
<3 TFP
 
xepherys's Avatar
 
Location: 17TLH2445607250
haha, that's the groaniest groaner I've seen here!
__________________
The prospect of achieving a peace agreement with the extremist group of MILF is almost impossible...
-- Emmanuel Pinol, Governor of Cotobato


My Homepage
xepherys is offline  
Old 01-18-2008, 11:26 AM   #5 (permalink)
let me be clear
 
ottopilot's Avatar
 
Location: Waddy Peytona
Quote:
Originally Posted by xepherys
haha, that's the groaniest groaner I've seen here!
I'll take that as a compliment... it's a sickness.
__________________
"It rubs the lotion on Buffy, Jodi and Mr. French's skin" - Uncle Bill from Buffalo
ottopilot is offline  
 

Tags
dad, drinking, shots


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 08:06 PM.

Tilted Forum Project

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0 PL2
© 2002-2012 Tilted Forum Project

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73