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-   -   Ocean life by kindergartners: (https://thetfp.com/tfp/tilted-humor/119876-ocean-life-kindergartners.html)

j0hnb 06-22-2007 05:12 AM

Ocean life by kindergartners:
 
I drew a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6)

Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea
all around you, you are incontinent. (Wayne age 7)

I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

A Dolphin breathes through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy age 6)

My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs.
(Millie age 6)

When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the
ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle
to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating
beans. (William age 7)

I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How
do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 7)

Some fish are dangerous. Jelly fish can sting. Electric eels can give
you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they
have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small.
(Kevin age 6)

There are a lot of suckers in the ocean. The Mafia put them there.
(Russ age 5)

Sultana 06-22-2007 05:53 AM

Quote:

A Dolphin breathes through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy age 6)
Bwahahha! I love kid's quotes! They think just like I do. :p

Charlatan 06-22-2007 06:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kevin age 6
When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small.

Shrinkage! You've heard of shrinkage, right?

fatboss 06-22-2007 07:20 AM

Aren't kids great?

Hilarious!

Nimetic 06-23-2007 05:46 PM

Good one about the mermaids.

noodlebee 06-23-2007 06:01 PM

I wonder what the reaction of the teacher was like... besides putting it online. Hahaha...

The Faba 06-23-2007 08:18 PM

Quote:

Electric eels can give
you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they
have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)
This kid has some good ideas.

xepherys 06-24-2007 09:57 AM

From the mouths of babes... Kid quotes truly are a wonderful thing!

troit 06-25-2007 11:07 AM

Here are a few more funny "kid quotes":

"Daddy, did your hair slip?" -- 3 year old son, to his bald but long bearded father

"Don't kid me, Mom, I know they're my feet." -- 3 year old son, when his mother told him his shoes were on the wrong feet

"How do you put make up on your mind?" -- Girl, when told she should make up her mind.

"And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us some email." -- 4 year old girl, misquoting the Lord's Prayer

"Germinate: To become a naturalized German."

Jetée 06-26-2007 03:22 AM

That last one about suckers makes you think...


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