Missing in action again...

[Xapphire]

I haven't used the computer for more than email and research for the past couple weeks, it's driving me nuts, but I'm soooo ready to move out of this house, and I'm trying to twist it every which way I can to make it happen.
We found a house, we fell in love with it, now we have to get a loan, and I just can't deal with the disappointment if we don't get it. We have an appointment with the loan officer on Thursday, but I'm so afraid someone else will put a bid in and it will get accepted before we have our ducks in a row. Tried to get pre-qualified, but the lender we were doing it with before has not returned calls, acknowledged messages, anything, so now I'm even more paranoid when I don't hear from this loan officer when she says she'll call.

If this doesn't work, I'm going to go insane, I'm probably already there after the stress of the past 6 months, but I can not handle another disappointment, I need this house.

I had to vent, get this off my chest someplace. I miss you girls, and hopefully will have good news to update this with, I've got to go try and nap a bit, I'm not sleeping well.

[annie1]

gosh well i hope everything works out for you. Ive never been in such a situation but i know with smaller issues im a very impatient person, I hate waiting and I always want to know where im gonna be and what im gonna be doing in the future, it drives me nuts when things are undecided.... anyway, good luck to you!

[Minx]

I know it's not easy but have faith and a positive attitude and good things will happen for you!
I'll send up a little prayer for you though if that'll help

[Xapphire]

The loan officer who hadn't called me, called me this morning. 9% interest rate! are you kidding me? I know we're a higher risk but anything over 7.75% is absolutely ridiculous. I'm so desperate for this house though, I almost thought about caving to it. I have the other loan officer appointment Thursday, I'll survive, I just want this house so badly. But I was offered a loan, so I'm not freakin' over being denied for a loan now, now I'm just freaking over the time frame.

[onodrim]

I hope everything works out for you Xapphire! Just hangin there, and we're always hear to listen.

[Xapphire]

Had our appt. with the other loan officer, hopefully should have a prequalification letter Tuesday and we can get a sales contract written up

So now I can't sleep because I can't wait. *grawr*

[BlueBongo]

Good luck! I know I'd like to move out and away from the apartment that I live in... but as phred has explained, it really is all we can afford. Plus we are attached to a lease thru October.

I'm almost tempted to just move out of the state before I finish at Jr. College and just transfer. I am disliking Az more and more.

But none-the-less I'm content.

I do hope that all works out for you though, Xapphire. Always feels good to move into a place you know you'll love and be comfortable.

[Xapphire]

today, Today, TODAY!

why don't people call first thing in the morning so that I don't have to sit in suspense? I'm going to go nuts before the day is out!

[lurkette]

Good luck Xapphire. I hope you get the house, but whichever way things turn out, I wish you peace. Don't forget to breathe deeply and find time for joy. It's a thing. A big, 30-year-mortgage, thing, but it's just a thing. Hug the people you love.

[Xapphire]

This house will bring me joy though. I've got it now, but I'll be able to express it there. I want it for my kids. I don't want them to be living like we are now, with my mother in law. I don't want them to be cooped up in a little apartment where they can't go outside to play because the rules in the complex are so strict they're suffocating. I don't want them not to know what it feels like to wander in the fields behind the house. Bah, I'm crying.

I'll survive either way, I'd just like to survive the way I want, not the way I'm forced to.

*hugs to the LL for letting me talk, and for me not feeling like an idiot for crying on a messageboard*

[cheerios]

/me hugs Xapphire

[Xapphire]

double posted. see below

[Xapphire]

The end.
No more stressing over waiting on phone calls, no more hoping and praying and lying awake nights thinking about this house.
It's not happening. I'm crying but I'm moving. I'm not stopped dead still, I'm still breathing. I'm not happy, but I am glad.
Glad that my little girls crawled into bed and rubbed my back while I cried. Glad that I could turn and breathe and hug them and smell their precious little girl smell.
Glad that even without this house that I wanted so badly, my life is still changing for the better. Glad that I've had this experience and will have others, disappointments and elations.

Thank you ladies for your kind thoughts. I have appreciated them.

[lurkette]

Geez, Xapphire. I'm so sorry it didn't happen. I'm glad for you that you're able to appreciate your girls, and move on. But I feel for you, and I wish you the best.

*hug*