apetaster

Claw hammer. When the only tool you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail (someone special first said that.)

pazza

those flip out hand fan things. Cheap, easy to use, effective. what could be better

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The above thoughts are not necessarily the thoughts of this user.

blkdmnd

Ahhh, the spork....

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I blow my nose at you. Now go away before I taunt you a second time.

Zotz

the pillow

the cup

the condom

MSD

The spork is a failure. Its bowl is too shallow to use as a decent spoon for soup, and its teeth are too short to spear much of anything, and barely suficient to hold food in place for cutting. It doe, however, have the second coolest name out of all utensiils, second to the spatula, adn more religious followers than teh spoon and the fork combined ever will have.

platypus

The Venus 2000

http://www.sybian.com/venus2000_overview.htm

and for the ladies...

The Sybian

http://www.sybian.com/sybian_overview.htm

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Out the 10Base-T, through the router, down the T1, over the leased line, off the bridge, past the firewall...nothing but Net.

sixate

The Titty Board Post Generator gets my nomination. That fuckin' thing saves a ton of time.

charlesesl

fire, we wouldnt be here without it

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It did not really matter what we expected from life, but rather what life expected from us.
Dr. Viktor E. Frankl

Sun Tzu

Clothes are materials of the same that make things translucent.

The Japanese method of folding metal in sword making.

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To confine our attention to terrestrial matters would be to limit the human spirit.- Stephen Hawking

User Name

Indoor plumbing. I cannot imagine how I survived 7 years of my life without it back in good ole' Ukraine.

uncle phil

sometimes, all i need is the air that i breathe...

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"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
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"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
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never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

Motry Latchman

Coffee and a hot shower for the morning.
Red wine and TFP for the evening.

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I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.
Groucho Marx

door

Liquid Prel (any shampoo).

It's bringing families together. A mother of 40 and a daughter of 16 are talking again for the first time!

"Oh mom, don't use to much, its concentrated" "Oh, it makes your hair shiney"

The heart lung Machine? whats so great about that. If its in your cabinet and it falls out...its gona break! Shampoo won't break.

And if you put a pearl in it, it sinks to the bottom real slow...

Gota love Mel Brooks

bundy

spice girls.
very nearly perfect.

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Ohayo!!!

zipper

Boobies, perfect in every way, nuture you when you are a yet a baby, and comfort you for the rest of your life. Ahhhhhhhhh......there is nothing like boobies......

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"If you wait 'til the last minute, it will only take you a minute!" Visit my home page http://zhphotography.zenfolio.com/

MrFlux

Bowls.... nearly perfect except I still spill stuff.

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flux (n.)
Medicine. The discharge of large quantities of fluid material from the body, especially the discharge of watery feces from the intestines.

redravin40

I'd have to say refrigeration.
It is true that man lived without it for a long time but he also died of rotting food, scurvy, drank warm beer and ate a pretty bland diet.
I've lived without running water and electricity. The thing I missed most was the refrigerator.

uncle phil

just saw a pic in exhibition...clothspins would qualify, if used properly...

__________________
"We were wrong, terribly wrong. (We) should not have tried to fight a guerrilla war with conventional military tactics against a foe willing to absorb enormous casualties...in a country lacking the fundamental political stability necessary to conduct effective military and pacification operations. It could not be done and it was not done."
- Robert S. McNamara
-----------------------------------------
"We will take our napalm and flame throwers out of the land that scarcely knows the use of matches...
We will leave you your small joys and smaller troubles."
- Eugene McCarthy in "Vietnam Message"
-----------------------------------------
never wrestle with a pig.
you both get dirty;
the pig likes it.

unoaman

For the readers out there, it's hands down gotta be...Throw away underwear with short stories printed in the crotch, for those that like to read on the crapper.

Karby

soap.
and deoderant.

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~my karma ran over my dogma.~

kutulu

I'm putting in a second vote for porn. Mags, video, DVD, internet, whatever. Life in my teens and early 20's would have been much less exciting without it.

Xepidemic

I say spoons

Bobaphat

The clock and irrigation. Where would be be without these?

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--size matters not-- yoda

jizzmasterp

I'm surprised no one has said this but industrial strength duct tape is one of God's many gifts to man.

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Don't mind the name. It was chosen before I discovered that there were forums that didn't start with "Titty."

DelayedReaction

I've broken 3 or 4 toilet seats in my life, and most of the ones are just too damn small nowadays. Being 6'9" doesn't make life easy.

The perfect invention is one that accomplishes what it was designed to do. It may break, but only after a designated design life. I vote for the spoon myself.

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If ignorance is bliss, you must be having an orgasm.

Hash_Browns

the internal-combustion engine...I only say this as the hubby pulls up in the driveway...I think it might work

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Smile It makes people wonder what you're up too!

Mephisto2

It's debatable if you could call these inventions, rather than developments but I humby submit the following.

In order,

Language
Writing

Without both of these, we would have no civilization, as we know it, and therefore none of the other more obvious "inventions".

Agriculture comes a close third.

I highly recommend the book The Third Chimpanzee for some very interesting discussions on this fascinating subject.


Mr Mephisto

KellyC

The umbrella. It's my best friend on the rainy school days when I have to walk home.

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Him: Ok, I have to ask, what do you believe?
Me: Shit happens.

rockzilla

Have you ever been... caught... in a zipper? There's nothing perfect about it.

tecoyah

Language....unbreakable, versatile, and the key to civilization.

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Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned. - Buddha

hulk

Unless you want to actually seal some ducts, then you've got problems =P

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"'There's a tendency among the press to attribute the creation of a game to a single person,' says Warren Spector, creator of Thief and Deus Ex."
-- From an IGN game review.

ironman

Thongs!

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If I agreed with you we´d both be wrong

Polyphobic

Snaps: those of you with infants will agree.
That and TP.

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<--The great infidel-->

Corvette3600

caffeine...nuff said

xjumper84

the perfect invention is NOT THE COMPUTER..

it sucks.. then again.. i'm just bored with it right now

BigGov

Dammit, took the words right out of my mouth. Made 'em a little more eloquent, but ya still took 'em right out of my mouth.

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One day an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub together. They each bought a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy beverage, three flies landed in each of their pints. The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust. The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened. The Irishman, too, picked the fly out of his drink but then held it out over the beer and yelled "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT IT OUT, YOU BASTARD!"

DirtyVegas

the pill....

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ouch!

tropple

The M-14.

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+++++++++++Boom!

KnifeMissile

If you're going to go that vein, out of ARTelevision's list, there are only three machines. The lever, the inclined plane, and the pulley.

The wheel and axle is just a lever that rotates 360&deg;.
The screw is just an inclined plane wraped around a cylinder.
The wedge is just an mobile inclined plane.

The three simple machines that I listed are, however, very different from each other. So much so, I believe, that the only thing they have in common is that they all trade distance for force to perform the same amount of work (likely, the definition of a machine).

BadNick

We're only human and nothing we make is perfect and as far as I can tell never will be ...unless your definition of "perfect" is less perfect than mine. I mean material objects of course. Maybe conceptual stuff can be perfect but I'm not philosphical enough to decide that.

Things break, wear out ...is that perfect? I don't think so. Some of the good ideas above are "nearly perfect" and that's good enough for me. I guess I'm just easy.