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Baraka_Guru
Last Activity:
Oct 29, 2024
Joined:
Jul 14, 2011
Messages:
12,247
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123
Positive ratings received:
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Winner 6 4
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Gender:
Male
Location:
Toronto
Occupation:
Editor

Baraka_Guru

Möderätor, Male, from Toronto

Staff Member

Oh, hi! Nov 12, 2018

Baraka_Guru was last seen:
Oct 29, 2024
    1. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Oh, hi!
      1. MeltedMetalGlob likes this.
      2. MeltedMetalGlob
        MeltedMetalGlob
        You are definitely missed around here. :)
        Nov 12, 2018
    2. RJAM24
      rjam24
      Is there a chance you could help me contact a former member on this site? My research led me to his post at thetfp on Aug 15, 2007. He wrote that his dad kept a photo of the Parshallburg Mill, hanging in his office at the road commission, until he retired. I' a historian, with family ties to that mill. Would dearly love to access the photo by RenaissanceII, then of Grand Rapids, MI.
      1. cynthetiq
        cynthetiq
        I have no way of contacting them at all.
        Nov 15, 2017
    3. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I'll probably just end up getting No Man's Sky if it ever gets released (and doesn't end up sucking).
      1. Wildmermaid
        Wildmermaid
        They fixed rather a lot of the broken and/or boring content with patches! Though the game still has some serious issues from what i've heard.
        Jun 19, 2017
        Baraka_Guru likes this.
      2. Baraka_Guru
        Baraka_Guru
        I never got it. I haven't looked into it again, but I'd sooner play something else at this point.
        Jun 19, 2017
    4. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Every time I think about getting Minecraft, I'm all, like, "Do I really want to go there...?"
    5. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Am I not in chat?
    6. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      But quarterbacks are always looking for a first "Taon."
      1. Lindy likes this.
      2. Lindy
        Lindy
        I didn't uh... "catch" this the first time I read it. It went over my head like an overthrown forward pass.
        Nov 28, 2015
      3. Baraka_Guru
        Baraka_Guru
        Ha. I thought maybe it was too lame.
        Nov 28, 2015
    7. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Every time Plan9 posts, I hear it narrated in the voice of Henry Rollins.
      1. Plan9
        Plan9
        Try Nicolas Cage. It's a better fit.
        Oct 21, 2015
      2. Baraka_Guru
        Baraka_Guru
        You're probably right. But are we talking "Castor Troy" Nicolas Cage or "The Wicker Man" Nicolas Cage?
        Oct 21, 2015
    8. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      My cock is called Stanley because it's a power drill with two-speed high-torque, high output, and a 3-year guarantee.
      1. Plan9
        Plan9
        Too bad that guarantee expired in 1997! OooOOOoo! Burn!
        Oct 17, 2015
      2. Baraka_Guru
        Baraka_Guru
        Sick burn, bro, especially since I wouldn't lost my virginity for another three years.
        Oct 17, 2015
    9. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      ... I am no less an illusion, and being thus, the illusion is real to me. I live, I burn with life, I love, I slay, and am content.
    10. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I pity the fool we all suffer!
    11. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      TECHNOTRONIC'D!
    12. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I drink the honey inside your hive.
    13. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      I'm Batman!
    14. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      All eyes on Alberta this week.
    15. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim.
    16. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      "The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper." —Eden Phillpotts, A Shadow Passes
    17. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Your sorcery knows no bounds.
    18. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Arcane abjuration isn't as flashy as evocation, but it's kind of a big deal.
      1. snowy likes this.
    19. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      Oh, I've *found* my calling, but I've got bills to pay, yo.
    20. Baraka_Guru
      Baraka_Guru
      The Force Awakens teaser trailer was released today, and I've had multiple nerdgasms.
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  • About

    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Toronto
    Occupation:
    Editor
    The details of my life are quite inconsequential. But very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical — summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve, I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking, I suggest you try it —

    Signature

    “I can't remember anything. I remember only ideas and sensations.”
    —James Joyce, Ulysses (1922)
    “Humankind cannot bear very much reality.”
    —T. S. Eliot, “Burnt Norton,” Four Quartets (1943)