Does your SO/you give bj's? Maybe NSFW.

Seconded, thirded and fourthed!

In the last couple of years of my first marriage, the only times we had sex it actually made me feel sick; she had the ability to consent, and even seem into it, but then switch direction to being obviously "only doing it for you, dear" that I felt like a rapist. This was one of the reasons that when her sex drive did a total 180 and she became rampant, wanton, and experimental it took me only one week to call her on the affair.

Fear a sudden massive change in sexual desire in your partner that is not related to your action or improved communication - it never happens "just because".

 

Not to be contrary to your experiences, but menopause can bring about exactly that--nothing to fear--something to look forward to. No birth control needed ever again is quite liberating. Also, prior to menopause having all the kids move out does incredible things for one's sexual desire, or so I hear.

 

I've been married for 30 years. My wife would not do it at all until about a month ago when to my surprise and delight, she went for it. Apparently it wasn't as bad as she had thought because she's done it several times since. I just have to make sure I don't cum in her mouth as that could be the last one. Bring it along slowly, in small steps. Yes, even though we've been married 30 years there are still surprises in the sex life!!

 

Did you ever find out what just made her do it?

 

Could have been tequila Truly I don't know. See, she was "date raped" when she was 14 and a virgin. The chump forced her to give him a BJ and then very roughly forced her to have intercourse. After that she didn't have sex with anyone else until me, and really had a lot of hangups. She didn't trust guys and we went together for a year before we actually had sex. I just think that she finally overcame that last hangup.

 

first wife woud not, new wife does.

new wife is awesome... for many reasons outside of that, but for that reason too.. more to the point, i told her early on in our sexual relationship, that there wernt many things i would not do for her, and that i hoped and somewhat expected that that same willingness to satisfy and please would be a ambition of hers as well. Now, i am a fairly "matter of fact" guy, and i think my wife apprecites that, so that approach worked well (for good comm, not necesarily just getting some head)

explain to her why its important to you to do that for her, and why its important to you for her to do it for you. break it down into emotions and feelings (hopefully there are emotions and feelings) those are the things that love making is supposed to represent in the first place. for me, a willingness to experiment and have no boundaries is a display of trust in a primal way. its not just hot and sexy, its expression in the relationship, and both are important.

 

you know, you give a little, you get a little...

pretty simple at my place..

 

I got one a few hours ago

 

I've never had one but if I was a man I'm sure I'd want one on a regular basis.

 

Rumor has it the female orgasm is super-awesome-mo-betterer than the male orgasm. It's the power of your tiny hooded penis.

I wanna try out that orgasm.

Probably kill me.

 

Nah, I don't think it would kill you Mr Plan9, you would just BEG for more.

 

It is gross to give but good to receive I have no right to judge but it is simply inconsistent!

My case is other way around, ready to give, but not to receive! Reason: It is too much to take.
--- merged: Apr 28, 2012 at 5:03 PM ---
it would sound extremely silly but how about some chocolate on your tool just before you go for it - it should not be too obvious. mildly scent and taste...

 

My SO loves chocolate sauce for this reason.

 

Or maybe the reason for the BJ's is the chocolate sauce.

 

Have you ever tried Marmite? I did once. I don't recommend it.

It was meant to be live yoghurt with honeycomb. But I was late. When I got there, she'd eaten the yoghurt and Marmite* was all that was available.

I don't recommend it. Especially not if you are tied up. Also, if you do try it, don't let her clean up with a cold, wet cloth afterwards.

Also, never trust a red-headed dancer who has bad feet from spending the day en pointe. And don't turn up late.

That's all, really.

* Marmite is a tangy, brown, sticky yeast extract spread thing that stings a little.

 

Sounds a lot like Australia's Vegemite. I've previously compared it to paste made out of testicles, bird carcasses and "fertilizer".

 

I've only sniffed Marmite. I'll add sweaty to the testicles.

 

Very similar!

I have a jar ready for you when you get here, love.

 

I'm trying to understand why anything would be needed to just enjoy the sex, I really like the "control I have" hehe with the "whole" thing you know.
But remember I have been married for 31 years. Wonder what he would think if I brought chocolate sauce to bed, I just might try that and "blow" his mind.

 

What's wrong with me? I can't visualize this scenario without worrying about the potential for a chocolaty, dripping mess on the sheets, carpet, etc.