New Tom Clancy game: Kill the American Patriots

Time to get that next generation well conditioned to do what their government will inevitably ask them to do. Super fun murder simulation game sending a crystal clear message to America's youth: kill any American that defies the government.

"Rainbow 6: Patriots offers a dynamic single-player storyline and innovative co-op and multiplayer experiences for fans of the tactical shooter series. Team Rainbow faces a new and very real threat called the "True Patriots," a highly-trained, well-organized revolutionary group that claim the American government is irrevocably corrupted by greedy politicians and corporate special interests. The True Patriots will do whatever it takes to reclaim their country. Playing as Rainbow, players will face critical scenarios that will require them to make tough ethical decisions in order to stop this new breed of terrorists."

 

Pfft. Come on, man. I wouldn't call a bunch of inbred bearded dudes in plaid shirts toting Mini-14s "a new and very real threat," now.

Do you get bonus points if you pick up their bloody copies of The Turner Diaries after you kersplat them with a M107 at 100 yards?

Rainbow 6: Occupy Wallstreet will be out next summer.​

Us 20-something obese liberal pinko homo-friendly useless whitebread bastards aren't interested in these '80s cliche "tactical shooter" games. They've lost us. They won't get us back until they come out with Harris and Klebold: Revenge! and Slaughter The Infidel: Roadside Bombs in the US.

 

100 yards? Pshh, in modern video games, the giant muzzlebreak on the M107 acts as a stand-off device.

 

Hmmm.

God's Work: Abortion Clinic Massacre will be out Fall 2013.​

Yes.

 

I'm personally waiting for DIRTY HIPPY PROTESTOR 2: Inconveniencing Commuters to come out around Holiday 2012. You get to throw molotov cocktails at law enforcement, block traffic, defecate in the streets and rape women. ​

 

This just in:

Rockstar's Hurricane Katrina: Rape & Pillage

July 2012​

So good.

 

RESTAURANT CITY: Somalian Top Chef!​

 

Yeah, but only one of the games mentioned above is real.

 

Did you read the rest of the description of the game? Kidnapping bankers and putting them in bomb suits to blow up targets or their kids will get shot in the head is not the same as peaceful protesting. This is going way over what the game is about and putting a lot of things out of context. I don't even play these games, and am pretty much a peace loving hippy, but In the missions that have already been described I don't think anyone could argue that you are just out there murdering people who disagree with the government. There is a difference between disagreeing and putting guns to children's heads to force their parents to be suicide bombers.

 

Mmm, seems like our boy Eddie would rather suggest that yuppie liberal video game makers are out to digitally blast Teabaggers with their wet work crew with the black masks. The reality is that this is just a play on white guy terrorists like McVeigh, Unabomber, militia numbnuts, etc. We've already had plenty of dumbass video games where white guys blast darkies, especially with the terrorist theme. Time for some white on white action.

DON'T TREAD ON ME.​