What do you call your Significant Other?

I am 40 my Partner is 43. To call her my "Girlfriend " seems idiotic. She is not my wife. Can't BE my wife for the time being, as we are both quite married to others on paper, though we have been together for over 5 years now. I do however, refer to her as my wife, as she refers to me as hers. as far as the "pet names" go, I think we are both a little greedy, as we both seem to each refer to the other as "MINE". as in "Oh hello MINE, you're up late! " or " MINE, will you check on the pricing of >some thing she can get at her place of employment< when you go in tomorrow?" or >door shuts< "hello MINE! I missed you today!"

 

My stepdad refers to Eden as his "man-in-law." It also makes me giggle.

 

Also, there was a time where I called my wife, my partner but there were too many times where people jumped to conclusions and assumed I was gay.

 

Before my husband and I married, we were together through a good twenty years and more kids than you could buckle up in most family vehicles. We always wanted to marry, but it always seemed to come down to the Almighty Dollar.

Pre-legal, I called him "husband," and he called me "wife."

Oh, I can't tell you how often we were challenged, on everything from our morals to our dreams for the future (i.e., more kids) to our commitment to each other.... Even our financial ethics, as some thought we were in cahoots to glean federal aid (even though we have been self-supporting and obedient little tax payers, even waiving certain write-offs on principle).

I learned to kick those people out of my psychological room of acknowledgement in the same way I'd kick them out of our bed if they tried to force themselves between our sheets.

Humph. Married is a matter of the heart and mind. My twelve cents.

 

I use her given name or a contraction. On a forum like this, I'll use "the Mrs" because she hasn't chosen to participate.

 

That is surprisingly hilarious.

 

None of the options in the poll apply, but in strict adherence to the OP, I don't qualify to respond. Since 1975, my darlin' has been "QW" (Quiet Woman... even before the onset of her spasmodic dysphonia). Mostly, when I speak of her or to her, she is my "sweetie."

 

Why?

 

More exigent priorities: bills, groceries, school supplies. We could've gone to the courthouse at any time, but we wanted our marriage to be a true celebration -- not only for us as a couple, but for our kids, too, since they were old enough to understand the meaning of the event. (And I'm not talking about wanting a $30k wedding.)

When we did marry, it was a JoP in our home, surrounded by only our kids and parents. It was inexpensive, but perfect. (The kids did the decor, cake, sewed the ring pillow, etc.) In retrospect, we could've pulled it off sooner. But when you're just trying to break even every month.... Our personal experience.

 

I hear ya. Even if you can afford extravagance, why should you?

I could easily afford to buy my woman a rock that costs as much as a new car and play dress-up with a bunch of strangers, but what's the point? I'd rather pack the 'frige with steaks, go on several nice vacations and invest the rest.

...

My significant others have always had set nicknames. I'm used to it from the military and I find it endearing thus I either give them or encourage them. My exwife had one that was a handcrafted nonsense word. My current woman picked hers and it is so perfect that she's received various gifts based on it. I've never had a nickname in a relationship and have always been called by my first name. I've also been trained to respond to various grunts and chuckles and sighs and shrieks and other noises.

 

@the_jazz

thats what i call her...him..err her. nevermind.

 

Exactly. The wedding was exactly what I wanted. On my finger, no rock. Just a slim little band of silver, and that's exactly what I wanted. The kids made our wedding. You just can't pay for that.

 

I'm going to tell him you said that.

*emails*

 

He's my husband but I like to say "my honey." I work with lot's of people who only have "Baby Daddies". It's really sad, too.

 

When I'm feeling neutral online, I refer to him as "spouse."
When I'm feeling warm and fuzzy, "hubs."
I had a son with him 2 years before we married. Health insurance was the reason we got married but I joked that I did not want my son to be "a little bastard" (most ppl did not appreciate my humour). I did not wish to be married--domestic partnership would have been the choice if we had it.
Offline, I call him by his real name. He is not the sort of person one gives a nickname to.
I am "princess" and "pumpkin" to him. He never calls me by my name.

 

(Respectfully snipped by me)


True, that is a quirky contradiction when you think about it. Truthfully, though? (And maybe I'm revealing some of my unconscious stereotyping here...) For a fifty-year-old woman to refer to her boyfriend as her "boyfriend" communicates to me the relationship is new-ish (comparatively), or she's dating. And that may definitely not be the case at all!

Now I see, in having been on that side of the experience, I felt using "boyfriend" to refer to my 15+year partner was unfair, unsuitable, and prejudicial. Yet I often felt like a liar calling him my "husband" -- in certain company.

Thought-provoking post, @Lindy! Daily Personal-growth Point goes to you!