foreign objects in your food

So tonight I was eating hersheys hot fudge sundae topping directly out of the glass jar. While slurping away I felt something slightly crunchy in my fudge topping. I assumed it was a bit of maybe some slightly charred or overcooked bit of fudge. But after chomping on it with my incisors a couple of times, I realized it was way too soft and not chewy enough for that. I thought about swallowing it down. Whatever it was was packed in a vacuum sealed jar, its probably sterile. But I made the mistake of sucking off the excess fudge and spitting out a dead fly in my hand. I almost lost it. I could still make out almost a whole wing and both eyes That were reddish under a flashlight. I'm still grossed out by it. I know this shit happens, flies get everywhere, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who has eaten insects in their food. But still, this skeeves me out. I'm going to think of this every time I think about that otherwise delicious ice cream topping. I don't want to spend the rest of my life testing every bite, waiting for the next bit of crunchiness.

So, what have you found in your food, and has it ruined you on a product?

 

I used to work in a grocery store. Someone returned a bag of whole dates from the bulk food section. He broke them open to show there was a huge fly in each one. Almost as long as the date. Disgusting.

 

I was down in the kitchen, late night, no need to turn the lights on and alert everyone to my nocturnal decadence, right?
Eating a chocolate brownie out of the pan.
And dropped a crumb on the floor.
Reached down in the darkness and picked up and ingested that tender morsel which turned out to be dirt on the floor, with said crumb about 3 inches to the left.......

 

I used to eat whole cans of spinach as a kid. I'd just open the can and go walking while I ate. (it was always better to be out of the house). One day I got half way through the can and saw a big, yellow corn beetle. I quit eating spinach for a few years... Oh well, I guess it's still better than pulling the beetle out of my mouth.

 

We have a winnaaaahhhh!!!! </Blerrchhhhh>

 

There is a certain amount of bug parts per million allowed in manufactured foods. Yum. Peanut butter is apparently full of it.

 

Same with processed meats, but hey, protein is protein.

 

My mother once opened a can of peaches and found what appeared to be some sort of cog for a machine. It was one of the weirdest things I had ever seen.

 

Hey, why those foreign bodies gotta steal our local body's positions as food detritus!?

I've found small stones in frozen foods over the years, and stems left in cans of green beans, but luckily no bugs (that I know about) or fingers or other body parts.
I did find a hair in a pack of cookies like you buy in a deli (hard-ish cellophane container), but I couldn't be sure it wasn't mine so I wasn't as disgusted as I would've been.

I guess as long as I can't identify what the foreign body is, I'm only gonna pause a bit to give it a second thought, then probably continue chowing down.
I ain't got time for that shit!

 

Yo Dawg, I hear you like meat, so I put some meat in your meat.

 

Does large chunks of onion (as in anything big enough for you can bite) count as foreign objects? That ruins anything for me. I would count olives in any form or texture to that list as well.

 

I accidentaly smoked a bit of the dogs liver cake once - it was dark and hard and a little bit crumbly.
The dogs keep finding my long hair in their food. I know this because they will be walking along with some strange xmas garland type of decoration of strung together dog logs hanging out of their arses.

 

One of my earliest childhood memories is discovering that the Gorton's frozen fish fillet I had been served for dinner was actually a piece of breaded and fried cardboard.

 

Gorgo, if we're going that route, I'm convinced there is no tuna in a can. Its just repackaged rotten chicken